My manager does not listen.

Anonymous

October 3,2023 at 5:53PM UTC

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My manager does not listen. she will jump in and take the conversation in the wrong direction and provide wrong information.

I tried telling her the client had issues with something, she cut me off and said the contract is under review that’s why the issues. It sounded wrong so I clarified but she further explained the contract being in review. I know my information was clear therefore I believed her. During a meeting with my client I passed along the info and they had no idea there was contract issues and after they emailed my boss and I.

my boss responded that she was not aware of any contact issues. Now the client is confused why I told them there were issues and even questioning my abilities.

She has done stuff like this before, today in a different client meeting she made me look incompetent.

how do I address this with my boss or do I just ignore her when she does it? my worry is sounding childish and being a complainer but I also don’t care to look bad to clients.

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AnonymousOctober 3,2023 at 8:15PM UTC
Sounds like y'all need to have a 1x1 chat about getting on the same page with communication. Since I don't know your manager's personality, it might be worth doing a little research on how you can approach this convo with them (might even want to consult chatGPT for script).
You should definitely document this experience and others (if you have them).
Focus on the goal of your convo, stick to the facts/script and leave it in her court to absorb the convo. Bearing in mind, they are still human and they may or may not be receptive to your observation or might have an entirely different POV (as mentioned above).
You could ignore her behavior and this could lead to frustration and resentment overtime. I don't recommend this but again, you've gotta do what's best for you.
Good luck to you!
AnonymousOctober 3,2023 at 9:26PM UTC
I would switch to documenting in email and clarifying in email so there is no question where the information or non-information came from.
You need to protect your reputation and be able to define yourself because trust me this will travel back to her boss and so on.
Renee S.October 3,2023 at 9:36PM UTC
Keep conversations documented over email and cc her boss
Renee S.October 3,2023 at 9:38PM UTC
I think on your 1 on 1 you can discuss how you want the two of you to better communicate and ways approaches to understanding. I wouldn’t point the finger but be respectful and address the facts of the miscommunication.
AnonymousOctober 4,2023 at 9:01PM UTC
Holy crap this could’ve been written by me. Well, if you figure it out, please let us know.
AnonymousOctober 4,2023 at 9:05PM UTC
Struggling to understand this comment.
AnonymousOctober 5,2023 at 2:28AM UTC
If she is going to join your client meetings, request an internal pre-meeting prep session and document the discussion and key events in follow-up email.
Do the same after the meeting (send a detailed follow-up to her documenting what she told the client). Hopefully this helps her say the right thing when speaking with the client, if not you are documenting what she says so hopefully, it eliminates the possibility of being blamed for her mistakes. Unfortunately, with the client you will need to fall on your sword. Good luck!
Melanie T.October 10,2023 at 1:49PM UTC
Your manager does not want to have a conversation or listen to you. Petty lies like the contract is under review when it is not are just to get you to shut up and go away, I'm afraid. Documenting what she said vs what the client told you, like someone commented below, will save your job in the future when she tries to throw you under the bus with hr. But do not repeat anything she tells you as a fact, verify everything, and start looking for a new job because she will try ro get you fired soon, or use her lies to make you look incompetent and her the hero.
LORI-ANN BURLINGAMEOctober 10,2023 at 3:15PM UTC
She sounds like a bully and someone who needs consistent attention and devalues other people. Be careful. Remember, when she acts like this in front of the clinets -- it doesn't say much about her professional.
One of my psychology advisors showed a copy of the book... "Snakes in Suits: When Psychopaths Go to Work is a 2006 non-fiction book by industrial psychologist Paul Babiak and criminal psychologist Robert D. Hare. The book describes how a workplace psychopath can take power in a business using manipulation."
I read the book and it help me understand management and the games people play. You may want to read it. (You can find paperback copies of the book on Albris, Amazon, etc.) It is a book worth reading.
Her behavior is a reflection on her. Do not lower yourself to her standards.