I am getting close to an offer for a job that I want.

Anonymous

January 19,2024 at 5:33AM UTC

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I am getting close to an offer for a job that I want. The third interview will be next week. He told me today, after our second interview, that if the meeting next week goes well, he wants to make me an offer next week by the end of the week. I am concerned about something, though. I have travel bought and paid for during my kid's spring break. Do I mention that before I accept or after? What is the protocol? Is there a protocol? Also, I have some medical stuff coming up. Do I mention that now? Nothing major. But I feel like I should be fully upfront. My husband says I shouldn't say anything until I sign the offer. Curious about what others think. I'm never sure how to handle these things.

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AnonymousJanuary 19,2024 at 10:05AM UTC
Say something before (during third interview: I want the opportunity; during spring break-- and take time unpaidi f no pto accrued"; they know you have a life outside of work.
I feel if you say something AFTER..
If they balk, run. It's a sure sign not a good place
Sounds like your gut feeling agrees- go with it
AnonymousJanuary 19,2024 at 1:24PM UTC
I've been up front with travel plans and I have seen many do the same. I told my boss when negotiating my offer that vacation time was just as important to me as salary.
AnonymousJanuary 19,2024 at 2:48PM UTC
The travel plans will likely come up in the next interview, so answer truthfully that you have a pre-paid vacation shortly after you start. It shouldn't be a problem unless it conflicts with some company-sponsored/required event. As for the medical, I wouldn't mention it now unless it will require an extended leave (more than a week).
CJB62January 20,2024 at 4:54PM UTC
i went through this same scenario last year. I had a European vacation planned and paid for when I was interviewing for a job. At the point of the third interview, they asked when I could start. At the point, mentioned the trip. I got the job and they moved my start date back to accommodate.
I would be truthful. If they aren’t willing to work with you given your circumstances, that would be a bit of a red flag.
Cynthia AnnJanuary 20,2024 at 9:15PM UTC
Be honest - plain and simple
when I onboard someone/ I ask if there are any dates or previously scheduled vacations we need to know about ☺️
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 1:46PM UTC
I agree, in the 3rd interview, and be honest but not defensive. No need to go into a lot of detail/justification. When discussing a possible start date, just say "I have pre-paid travel plans with my family from X to X, but I can start on X" (keep the focus on the positive, your start date.) As for the medical stuff, unless it's something major that will keep you from work for weeks, no need to mention it until you're in the job. Good luck!
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 1:56PM UTC
I would divulge the vacation planned but not the medical stuff. They have no business knowing your protected health information.
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 2:46PM UTC
Wait until you have the offer then accept based on the understanding that you must have that time off (paid or.not). If they would not work with you on that, then they are not worth working for anything. You'd already be giving them weeks (if not months) of prior warning.
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 4:12PM UTC
Agreed. Once you have the offer in writing and you are to respond, express your enthusiasm about the job and mention your spring break plans at that time.
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 3:11PM UTC
Pretend you’re a guy. Say nothing. Plus, you do not yet have an offer. Worry about one thing at a time.
Judith SheehanJanuary 21,2024 at 3:52PM UTC
I would wait until you get the offer. Hopefully not, but it could put a wrench in things and cause them to choose the other candidate.
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 7:49PM UTC
Say nothing. Get the offer and when you have signed off on the details, then bring up the pre-planned time with family. As for the medical needs when the time gets closer only give a short notice on that as you are protected from any issues with taking that time. For the vacay part you might not have accrued enough time by then or earned the time away so be sure to say you plan on taking it as unpaid if need be and can check in if there are issues.
Jessica CardJanuary 21,2024 at 8:13PM UTC
Echoing — wait! I wouldn’t tell them until your first day/week.
AnonymousJanuary 21,2024 at 10:24PM UTC
Good question and happy you are progressing along in the process. I have seen these situations play out in a couple of different scenarios.
It is not uncommon for new hires to have planned travel at a future date that the employee may nor may not have time off to cover. When you accept it is important to update the manager, so they know. The company always has the ability to "approve" the time off whether paid or unpaid. If you wait too long to tell them they may deny the time off and you are forced to call in sick for the days, you are not there and be subject to attendance guidelines. Waiting too long to tell could label you problem employee.
In regard to medical, even if you are not eligible for FMLA leave, you may be eligible for ADA coverage which is protected time.
Best wishes!
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 12:20PM UTC
I guess it depends on when the travel is, but most spring breaks are from March to April. If you have accepted a job that will start in January, I think that there is time. The only problem could be if there are other people in your department who are also taking their kids on break as well.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 1:40PM UTC
I believe several of the comments here are close, but missed the mark. The fact that your vacation has already been paid for is irrelevant. If you have a prior commitment and require time, mention it in advance of formal acceptance of a formal offer. Medical does not have to be disclosed, and in my opinion should not be.
This way you have been forthright, and it will not be a “I wish I knew that before you accepted” situation on the side of the employer.
as at least one of their comment or stated, it is not uncommon for a new employee to have committed plans that need accommodation. However, when there is surprise, it very rarely reflect well on that new hire.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 2:23PM UTC
1. medical, does not need to be disclosed that is your private info.
2. vacation: this should be disclosed especially if it’s before you’ve had a chance to accrue time off. This is not uncommon and every time I have mentioned this there was not an issue. Timing is key though, do not bring this up before the offer unless asked directly—otherwise you risk coming off as presumptuous. But do tell them before you accept the offer. This shows good faith on your end. And by the time you have the written offer, they have made up their mind. Depending on your role they may need to think of coverage for the time you are out. If it comes out later, it will appear disingenuous and this way you know that you are preapproved for this time off. The only exception of not saying anything would be if you are aware you’d have accrued PTO vacation by the time you have your vacation. Especially if you want to be in this company for the long haul—always be considerate. If the company is not flexible enough to allow you to take your pre planned vacation, perhaps this isn’t the best culture to be a part of.
3. Real life example: for a seasonal lifeguard position i took we were asked directly about summer plans and vacations. One of the employees was not forthright about a 2.5 week vacation he had planned. It strained the coverage and he was not truthful so he was terminated. Be up front when you have the offer. Take the high road.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 2:26PM UTC
Having been in HR for many decades, it is not uncommon for new hires to have vacation commitments. I only discussed it with candidates after an offer was formally made, myself included when I was offered a position.I feel pretty strongly having had it done to me. I would not discuss this prior to an offer because it may affect the offer ever being extended, being honest is one thing being cautious is another.
Employers can be quirky, they may just say no it’s not possible because it’s a slight inconvenience to them when in fact, it may not be I don’t say this easily either ,they may just say no it’s not possible because it’s a slight inconvenience to them when in fact, it may not be , I don’t say this easily, when you’ve been on the other side and you know what goes on, it can be challenging to side with an employer who can be manipulative and selfish
to side with an employer who can be manipulative and selfish. Also, they should be discussing vacation with you prior to the offer if you ask, what are the benefits you don’t have to zero in on paid time off you’d like to look at the entire package and that would include family leave health benefits, etc. etc. being upfront doesn’t always benefit you, I’m sorry to say.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 2:44PM UTC
i would mention it after you accept the offer in the same conversation.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 6:05PM UTC
Share that info once they make the offer and you discuss potential start dates.
Just say you have pre-existing plans & they should be fine with that.
AnonymousJanuary 22,2024 at 6:10PM UTC
Nothing new to add, just want to give you more signal that you should wait until after the offer.
I agree with all the advice others have shared, no need to share prior to that stage. Also, if they back out for those reasons, be glad to know that before joining...it's a flag. :) Good luck!
AminJanuary 22,2024 at 8:07PM UTC
Just take it easy
If they ask say it and if they don't
Keep it to yourself
Never lie just be honest
AnonymousJanuary 23,2024 at 12:58PM UTC
from a legal standpoint an offer can’t be withdrawn once there’s a signed offer letter by you and the employer.
I was in HR for over 30 years and the only time I saw an offer withdrawn was due to someone failing a drug test or a background check. The offer letter stipulates that the offer and employment is contingent upon passing both of those things required by the company. It never says anything about undiscussed vacation.
AnonymousJanuary 24,2024 at 3:06PM UTC
I have walked into every job I have ever had letting them know of any vacation plans and have it written into the offer as acknowledgement. Even if I didn't have a vacation planned I still always planned a week off since usually you cannot take time till you complete a year. Reason I had them write it on the offer letter is too many time people change positions and I have seen them say well I didn't approve it so can't afford to have you take time now. After watching that happen to someone once when I first started my career many moons ago makes me remember to protect myself.
Robin StrayhornJanuary 24,2024 at 4:37PM UTC
From my experience, it is best to be fully transparent. Share that information with the recruiter and/or hiring manager as soon as possible.
Good luck in your new role!
Krystin MorganJanuary 24,2024 at 5:34PM UTC
I would let them know about the vacation when you receive an offer. In my experience, this is almost always completely fine and the worst case scenario is that you just won't be paid for that time off if you haven't accrued the time off yet.
I'm not sure I would let them know about the medical stuff yet, however; if you have specific things already booked, then sure, but otherwise I would not get ahead of yourself.
Farah BajwaJanuary 24,2024 at 6:17PM UTC
I think everyone is different and that there isn't a guideline for when this is discussed. From personal experience, if it didn't come up during the interview, I leave it until they ask me, "when can you start"?
Companies are aware that people have lives they need to transition so I feel having open communication benefits both parties.