I feel stuck because I’m divided… is anyone else going through being so divided that you’re lost?

Anonymous

January 23,2024 at 8:11PM UTC

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I feel stuck because I’m divided… is anyone else going through being so divided that you’re lost?

long story… but I’ve been in two career camps for well over 10 years: hair stylist/ accounting. I’m decent at the accounting but hate the work. I am well versed in on location styling for luxury weddings…. I also make jewelry and would LOVE for that to be my real job but … bills. Which is why I’ve held on to the accounting thing. Because stability. But I hate it and the company I am with is at best soul sucking and truly has no future . (For example, employees can’t contribute to 401k for a year and then once you can, there’s no company match)

I’ve come to resent the hair part of my life because it’s fickle in a salon and I’m getting older and not so willing to be the people pleaser I was at one time.

I feel like I am spiraling and cannot even think of anything I’d like to do that is realistic. Just feeling stuck. dreams feel unattainable and like it was for a younger version of me and like it’s too late now…. Plus I have a mortgage and so I cannot just bail out and throw caution to the wind.

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Pamela GonzalezJanuary 23,2024 at 8:30PM UTC
Hi! So all I can’t say what is best for you and your particular situation what I can reiterate to you is probably what you are already aware of common sense. I do believe that you are leaving civility to do your own thing. That can be scary. What I would do is keep the job in accounting and try to build up a clientele on the side as you build your clientele and you get busier you’re working more hours, but weigh them out. You don’t necessarily need to be in the salon 24 seven. I’m sure you can market yourself to the way you would meet your clients at the salon and then leave. That way you have higher end, clients, and you don’t need to be there 24 seven. You may also look into some online work and accounting, but I would try to blend the two until something draws you harder, one way or the other. I will try to look through gratitude and realize that you have two options, and many people do not have that opportunity so that is great. I am in a similar situation, so I fully understand . I would also take in consideration what benefits are provided where and what you need for your current living situation
AnonymousJanuary 23,2024 at 9:26PM UTC
What is the point of a company 401K that doesn't match? You might as well just invest on your own.
Maybe look into a numbers based position that has a little more variety, like financial analysis?
Drop the salon and see if you can get your jewelry sold at art & craft fairs. You can get out a bit and meet new people.
AnonymousJanuary 23,2024 at 10:59PM UTC
I'm sorry to hear you've hit rough patch but I have no doubt you can pull yourself out of this too.
It sounds like the hair styling should stop. You should not continue to do things you don't enjoy. Granted, I know that's a stream of income but if you are at the "hating" point, then you should definitely stop because it will eventually (if not already) transfer to your clients.
I'd rather see you invest that energy into your jewelry business because that's what you want to do, anyway! Plus, it might be the outlet you NEED to offset how you feel about your accounting gig...for now. Plus, it could push you to get up out of your accounting gig faster LOL
As for the accounting gig, I hear you about not quitting...yet because you have a mortgage and bills to think about. Is there something else in that realm that interest you, or is there another job you could pivot to at your current company? Like are there any other open positions you'd be willing to pivot to just to stay afloat for the time being until your jewelry business takes off?
The other option is to look at doing consultant work on the side, or look at getting a "bridge job" in a completely different industry & role so you have a stable income. I know I know....the job market is tough but there are jobs out there you can do! May it be part-time, contract or seasonal that might be what you need to change things up and keep you interested until you're ready to scale & grow your business.
Speaking of scaling your business, do not underestimate looking into entrepreneurial grants and apprenticeships from various organizations. I've seen a lot of organizations post grant applications/scholarships for small/micro businesses looking to grow. At the very least, these sorts of organizations can give you the mentorship, coaching and financial support you need to really be a full-time entrepreneur. With the extra time to focus on your business, you can invest time looking into these sorts of opportunities too!
2024 is pushing us all to get creative with how we make money (legally, of course) so don't give up! I know it's rough now but I have no doubt you CAN DO THIS!!!
Keep going! I can't wait to see what you do with your business. Congratulations on choosing YOU!!
Cindy GloverJanuary 24,2024 at 3:25AM UTC
How about opening your own business?
AnonymousJanuary 24,2024 at 3:16PM UTC
Hi. I just wanted to say that I understand and can relate to what you’re going through. The term “soul-sucking” is spot on. I entered the workforce only 12 years ago because I was a stay-at-home mom and before that so was a professional dancer. I am in the process of job searching and every job for my skill set looks uninteresting. While I’m waiting for my next job, I’m going to volunteer because that makes me happy. That catchy phrase “do more of what makes you happy” makes sense to me now at this stage of my life. I hope you find that healthy balance.
AnonymousJanuary 25,2024 at 4:50AM UTC
I've been doing soul sucking work for 25 years and am just trying to hang in there till I can retire. I'm exhausted in every way possible.