Resigning from a toxic workplace

Anonymous

July 21,2023 at 1:45AM UTC

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Resigning from a toxic workplace

I work at a leadership level and am giving my resignation and simply want to say I received a better offer in terms of salary and responsibilities. There are so many that will pry for the reasons. I feel like, you didn't listen to me while I was here so my words don't carry any more weight now. It will just be fodder for gossip and BS. Hence, I want to stick to my short and sweet script. Anyone been through this and what did you experience? Thank you!

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AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 2:28AM UTC
It's too late to play the games. The reasons why are irrelevant. Move on and don't worry about who wants to know what. It shouldn't be a big secret by now.
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 2:44AM UTC
Anytime I resign from a job I normally don’t get into the reason and just focus on helping with the transition in my remaining time. You never know how you’ll overlap with these colleagues again in the future so it’s best to keep it as professional as possible. Congratulations on your new role! Hope it is a healthier environment and the right fit :)
Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistJuly 21,2023 at 4:38AM UTC
YOU SAID: "simply want to say I received a better offer in terms of salary and responsibilities."
You do not need to provide any of that information - it is none of their business if you're getting a higher salary nor what your responsibilities will be. Just tell them you are resigning and thank them for the opportunity.
Dear Soon To Be Ex-boss:
Please accept this as my written resignation, effective August 4, 2023. Thank you for the opportunity.
Signed,
Happy Anonymous
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 11:34PM UTC
That's not realistic. You know questions will be asked.
Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistJuly 21,2023 at 11:39PM UTC
They can ask whatever questions they want - it's still none of their business.
Lucky JackJuly 21,2023 at 7:26AM UTC
I was in the same boat I quit
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 11:54AM UTC
I put it in writing - my last day.
Kept my word. The end
As an aside, HR begged me to quit sooner than my 2w and my director of accounting job went to the receptionist. (HR didn't think paid out PTO - though in handbook) was fair because she simply didn't like me
Place was HORRIBLE
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 2:40PM UTC
If compensation is not the reason you are leaving, I would not mention it in the resignation announcement or letter. I would say, "I have found something more in line with my future career goals," and let it go. This is how I resigned from my last three jobs, and none of them asked any more questions or had any problems with how I stated it.
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 11:32PM UTC
Comp is part of the reason :)
AnonymousJuly 24,2023 at 9:49PM UTC
If you put comp as part of your reason for leaving, you are leaving yourself open to a counter-offer, inquiries as to where you are going, and how much they offered you, and many have stated comp is rarely all of the reason one leaves. All of those other reasons will still be there. Toxicity will not become palatable with a bigger paycheck. The toxic a--h----- will still be there.
Kelly ClarkeJuly 23,2023 at 1:51AM UTC
Put as little in writing as you can. I’ve seen a coworker’s resignation letter forwarded around the division - so awkward.
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 3:44PM UTC
Totally. Been there, done that. One GM was hell on wheels, and made my last two weeks a little more hell than usual. And then, hugged me right before I walked out the door. Jeesh!!!
AnonymousJuly 21,2023 at 11:31PM UTC
Wow. That IS messed up!
AnonymousJuly 23,2023 at 1:50AM UTC
Been there… Do NOT tell people where you’re going. “I’m grateful for the opportunity to X here & will really miss Y. Change is hard, but this new opportunity is very closely aligned with my personal/professional vision. I’ve been asked to keep it low-key, but will update LI once I get settled.”
Spoiler: It’s been 2 years. My LI says I work at “A Company”. Explained to my coworkers that I have a mentally unstable family member with a history of contacting my employers with bizarre stories about me and that I was advised by an attorney to skew more secretive online until said relative gets help/stabilized. (Unfortunately this is mostly true - everything save the part where I actually believe this relative will ever get psychiatric help).
Sharon C. Kiely MDJuly 23,2023 at 1:39PM UTC
There is no need to share anything other than your final date. That said thinking about how you want to show up when you leave is important even in toxic situations. Being kind and respectful is always a good plan. Just know you can’t control their reaction which could include asking you to leave immediately. Sounds as though you have a plan. Good luck in your next adventure.
maria roseJuly 23,2023 at 1:59PM UTC
When leaving a toxic workplace, don’t burn your bridges when giving the exit interview survey and in your goodbyes to your colleagues because you never know if you will see them again in a future position, especially in today’s workplace environment where people job hop from one job to another.
Learn to evaluate what you got from that specific workplace and how it developed your job skills. Believe it or not, being able to work effectively in a toxic workplace environment does give you skills to focus
AnonymousJuly 23,2023 at 3:12PM UTC
Just stick to your script. Unless you're in violation of a non-complete with your new position, you don't need to tell them anything.
AnonymousJuly 23,2023 at 3:14PM UTC
I've been there and simply state that I have an opportunity that more aligns with my goals. If people ask deeper, I say that I would prefer not to say and leave it at that.
Cindy GrossJuly 23,2023 at 3:20PM UTC
You don't owe an explanation for your actions. Practice not going into long explanations for any work decision.
AnonymousJuly 23,2023 at 3:49PM UTC
That is definitely the best approach. You gain nothing by sharing after you’ve made the decision to leave. In fact, you stand to burn bridges you may need in the future. Leave on a positive note. Those around you likely saw your struggles and they will respect you more for staying positive.
AnonymousJuly 23,2023 at 4:43PM UTC
Yes, definitely and also since I work in HR/Legal it is often met with hmmm when you are well liked in the org or at a certain level. I think what you say is you were recruited away to an opportunity too good to pass up and where you have the chance to make an impact on an organization that really wants your leadership to effect change. Then it is not so much about money but more about content and you will be looked upon more favorably. If you say you have left for money they might try to counter offer you to stay and that could be awkward. If you say it's about content then they have no recourse. Congrats on finding a new place where I hope you get all you hoped for and more.
Coach Nancie Kay ShumanJuly 24,2023 at 12:11AM UTC
You actually don't have to say anything about your reasons for leaving. Simply saying, I have chosen to leave on this date, Thank you for the opportunity to be part of your team. And leave it at that. Saying that you have a better offer on the table could open up a conversation about WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO KEEP YOU? and do you really want to have that conversation? Because it sounds as though they need a ground up reconstruction, that could be an awkward conversation.
AnonymousJuly 24,2023 at 1:08PM UTC
I kept it short and positive. I’ve never heard of anything good coming from someone who was fully up front about toxicity. The one time I was honest, at a temp job, I was specific and related it to outcomes, with the support of the long-term staff. Two jobs later I landed my dream job with a very large firm. Found out Mr.Toxic was also working there and made revenge his top priority. It was awful.
Rob GonzalezJuly 24,2023 at 5:09PM UTC
I vote for short and positive. If you are going to discuss your concerns, keep it limited to your HR exit interview, and even then, keep it constructive. Honestly, only do this if you care and especially if you actually want to be rehired and want to see changes made (based on your mention of being rehire-able). Otherwise, there really is no point.
Cindy GloverJuly 25,2023 at 12:50AM UTC
Every single time I see this title or anything relational to a toxic workplace or person, I feel someone is writing my story - I think it’s a bit more than a sign for me to GTF up outta there
i would take a moment and thank them each, individually for the opportunity and lessons they taught you and leave it at that
AnonymousAugust 1,2023 at 12:28AM UTC
Do Not fall for it. I worked in HR, if it's toxic they know darn well it's toxic. Just keep it short and sweet. They don't care, or they're mentally ill and still it won't fix the problem. Seriously, it's a phenomenon. I am currently dealing with some really crazy stuff and the turnover is really bad. The only things is they might want to counter your offer and try to get you to stay Be ready for that.