Talked to the HR

35 Comments

1. AnonymousApril 19,2023 at 6:35PM UTC

   Sad this is happening. TRUTH about HR... thanks for posting this.

2. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistApril 19,2023 at 11:25PM UTC

   I'm sorry that you've had to deal with a manager like that and I'm glad that you felt you were able to go to HR but I wouldn't let my guard down just yet.

   There may be repercussions when your boss finds out you went to HR. Please make sure you are documenting EVERYTHING.

3. AnonymousApril 20,2023 at 1:55PM UTC

   hopefully the company has an official policy about retaliation as well.

4. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistApril 20,2023 at 5:27PM UTC

   Official policy or no, there are posts on here all the time about the reality of it happening.

5. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 7:58PM UTC

   yes, people have common negative interactions with HR but at the end of the day it's who a company puts into their HR department that makes or breaks it. I recently heard a story where VP of People was the perpetrator of workplace harassment - who can the victim report that to? HR is rebranding into different things - People, Employee Relations, etc - and although HR has let people down for many many years, that doesn't mean that's not changing. there are many HR leaders, as well as HR newbies like myself, who are passionate about employees/people who are aiming to reshape the space. unfortunately, change doesn't happen overnight. we should not be telling people to not report things to HR. the alternative to that would be what, to suck it up and deal with it for fear of losing their job? worst advice. instead we should be encouraging people to continue advocating for themselves, whether it comes to professional growth and development, salary, working conditions, working arrangements, OR workplace inappropriateness.

6. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistApril 22,2023 at 3:14AM UTC

   YOU SAID: "we should not be telling people to not report things to HR"

   We should not. I would not suggest that nor did I.

7. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 11:44PM UTC

   Doesn’t matter. Document EVERYTHING!!!!’

8. AnonymousApril 20,2023 at 11:12AM UTC

   Thank you. It was scary speaking up. I didn’t know if they would believe me. But they believed me which was a big relief.. but they are yet to talk to my lead. Hopefully things workout and not backfire on me.

9. AnonymousApril 20,2023 at 11:23AM UTC

   Yes!! Super proud. Now, be prepared to not know what happens if you don't 'see' what happens. That's okay. If behavior continues document when, where and any witnesses. Also, if it's about your boss that's okay, if they find out how does ANYONE expect a change if they don't bring it to their attention. If there's retaliation, again document the heck out of it. Never be afraid of doing what's right, you are undoubtedly saving someone else to go through the same thing.

10. Valerie RiegerApril 20,2023 at 12:41PM UTC

    HR is responsible for doing the right thing, and that doesn't necessarily mean protecting the employer. If she has gotten a supportive and favorable response from her HR department, don't try to negate that.

    The resources from SHRM and the EEOC are spot on, but please don't paint HR as the villain in every story.

11. Dee ButlerApril 20,2023 at 1:12PM UTC

    Hello,

    Check to see if your company has Employee Relations Department. HR usuallyfavors the company. Employee Relations advocate for the employee.

12. AnonymousApril 20,2023 at 5:06PM UTC

    'HR favors the company' - meaning not the manager not the employee, if the manager is being inappropriate, then a good HR manager needs to favor the company and deal with it. If the manager is truly inappropriate, this is a legal risk for the company.

13. Joan Williams, Senior Talent Acquisition SpecialistApril 21,2023 at 4:30AM UTC

    It is indeed a legal risk for the company but how many times have we read here - and other places: I went to HR about being harassed and I was the one who was fired.

14. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 11:43PM UTC

    too many …….

15. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 5:11PM UTC

    I went to Employee Relations. They report into HR. I was let go after talking to ER. Same person was in the meeting when I was let go. I was discriminated against but no real documentation to prove it (very hard to document). The ER colleague kept referring to needing documentation.

16. AnonymousApril 20,2023 at 5:07PM UTC

    The company NOT the manager.

17. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 3:07AM UTC

    I wish I could. I don’t trust them when they behave like the others do.

18. Erica MitchellApril 21,2023 at 8:09AM UTC

    Unfortunately, not all HR employees are like yours. Where I work, they back the management no matter what.

19. ToddApril 21,2023 at 12:35PM UTC

    I had my director on video threatening my supervisor's job and "hoping that [I] take the right side of this." I talked to HR as well, gave them the video along with two years of documentation of toxic behavior. They were also super nice and approachable. They did nothing, however. Not a word of follow-up. Five months later I left my job of 30 years. Now I'm somewhere new that's possibly worse.

20. BNApril 21,2023 at 12:50PM UTC

    Unfortunately with HR, they can only make a change if senior leadership buys in. Managers are allowed to threaten jobs, they're allowed to yell at their employees. None of that is illegal unless there are protective classes involved or actually law breaking (for example in the OP physical contact is a hard no). I agree with your decision to leave your company. That must have been an incredibly difficult decision.

21. BNApril 21,2023 at 12:46PM UTC

    I think approaching HR is good advice in general. However being in HR, there are good HR and bad HR people. It's hard to take the leap of faith so I think everyone's best bet is when approaching HR, do it with documentation (keep a backup of this documentation but do not email your personal email address from your company email. This may be a violation of company policy and you may get flagged by your IT if they're doing their job properly).

22. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 1:00PM UTC

    Great job advocating for yourself!

23. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 1:05PM UTC

    Since I am HR I know how intimidating it can be to go to HR for things, so thank you so much for sharing your good HR experience. Sadly the bad HR people give all HR a bad reputation. Yes we are here to protect the company but we are also here to advocate for our employees so they have to be put in bad situations. I’m so glad your HR person was able to help you.

24. Dcre1977April 21,2023 at 1:25PM UTC

    The goal of HR is to protect the company from lawsuits and fines. However, like all regulatory departments, they are only as good as management lets them be.

25. Brigette WildsApril 21,2023 at 1:48PM UTC

    This is excellent to hear! Many companies also have a Hotline and I’d encourage everyone to speak up if you have a concern. Companies cannot fix issues they don’t know about

26. Becca A.April 21,2023 at 4:12PM UTC

    Can you give us an update on how things are going?

27. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 4:51PM UTC

    Myself and another employee were having issues with a manager. She went to HR and is was ugly. Because of that, I went to the Legal Dept who has an ombudsman in it. I found it a slower process, but felt better and heard. Our HR dept tended to protect the manager every single time, of which there were many.

28. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 5:05PM UTC

    Going to HR backfired on me. In the past they were helpful so I thought it would be ok. It was not and I was let go. Ultimately (and unfortunately) HRs primary role is to protect the company. My company promoted themselves as being colleague centric and were in many ways, but it felt like an empty promise after the way I was treated. They kept on talking about needing documentation. Most of the interactions were verbal with no one else involved Very disappointing. Just be careful.

29. AnonymousApril 21,2023 at 7:43PM UTC

    I'm sorry this happened to you.

    I would like you to consider it from HR's side. I would make the comparison that HR is sorta like the police, but for companies. If you went to the police with an accusation, they typically take your statement but they would also need proof so they can investigate. Similarly, if you go to HR, they can't just take your word for it - they would need proof aka documentation as well.

    There are ways to document interactions even if they were verbal. You can do a simple write up of what happened right after the interaction and email the person. "I would like you to acknowledge that I did not give you consent to touch my shoulders. This was inappropriate and I would appreciate it if you stopped doing that." Regardless of whether the person answers or not, it gives "documentation" for if you need to build a case.

    Of course, you don't need to agree with this advice - but this is advice that I will always give and I will always follow.

30. AnonymousApril 22,2023 at 10:35PM UTC

    I had witnesses and emails for a coworker who was harassing me & actually chased me at one point! HRs suggestion after our group meeting, "go have coffee together"!!

    Ridiculous!!! Finally much later, she was deemed unfit for continuing employment. She went by the initials 'JM' which in my mind, I dubbed "Just Miserable".... HR should have taken it more seriously and perhaps she might have gotten help before losing it. Sad...

31. Vanda LeeApril 22,2023 at 6:14AM UTC

    It just depends on the company's HR culture. I've had great HR support and horrible HR support.. one bad experience sometimes sets the distrust for the rest of people's perception of HR in general which is sad.

32. AnonymousApril 22,2023 at 7:30AM UTC

    thanks for the tip, we should all always speak up when needed.

33. Paula BrantnerApril 23,2023 at 1:01PM UTC

    As I frequently tell people, HR is not your friend. That doesn't mean that you didn't have a positive experience, and that there aren't good HR people out there: there are. But 70% of the people who come forward to report harassment face retaliation. And if you don't come forward, the company may say they weren't aware of the problem, so they had no obligation to do anything to fix it. Harassers rarely if ever harass only one person over the course of their lives. There are almost always others out there. It certainly helps, when going to HR, to have multiple people reporting the same conduct, so you can show a pattern of behavior and not just you talking about your own experience. Because when confronted with inconvenient truths, particularly when the more powerful person is more indispensable to the company, it can be hard for HR to do something about it without senior leadership's support.

34. AnonymousApril 30,2023 at 7:18PM UTC

    You hit on the real issue there at the end. Saying "HR is not your friend" does spread an idea that most HR wouldn't intend to protect you.. in my 15 years of experience at various companies , HR majority of the time intends to protect, however, they are not in any way the authority. Their role is viewed by C-suite as a guide/advisor.. but if upper level leadership does not approve their policies or agree to let them enforce them, HR often gets shut down . Also legal enforcement like against harassment claims is unfortunately really hard to make stick. Many HR reps are jaded because they've not been allowed to be effective so without substantial witnesses they don't try hard to defend even if they want to and think it's right.

35. Valerie RiegerMay 1,2023 at 3:21PM UTC

    As I'm an HR professional, I can assure that I am not always the villain. I am sometimes the only voice of reason in the room. It is oftentimes thought that HR is the final decision maker, the voice above all voices and that isn't true. I am given a boatload of responsibility with very little authority. I am often the bearer of bad news and painted as the villain because managers don't want to look like the bad guy. I do my best every single day to do the right thing. In that equation, someone is always unhappy with the decisions that I make. I am committed to telling the truth and acting in a moral and ethical way.

    Do I protect the organization? Yes, I do. But that doesn't mean that I protect managers that are engaged in wrong doing. Do I protect the employees? Yes, I do. But that doesn't mean that I protect employees who aren't doing their jobs or are engaged in behaviors counter to the organization's standards.