Good Evening, and I am only asking for kind supportive comments from people who may struggle with PTSD and Eaggerated startle Response- common with this diagnosis, unfortunately.

17 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 2,2023 at 1:48PM UTC

   I would hope your therapist is helping to desensitize you to these professional situations with some coping skills and tactics to dull your response. If not, I'd really focus on finding someone new.

   If you're startled by everyone at this new job and feel awkward about your exchanges with these co-workers, they speak up! When this happens, say: it's not you, its me; I startle easily; can you please verbalize as you're coming to talk to me, etc. Leaving this hanging without addressing the obvious is the awkward part about this exchange.

   Best wishes to you.

2. Michele Christine PardonNovember 2,2023 at 10:33PM UTC

   Thank you very much for all your sugesstions! They were very helpful.!

3. AnonymousNovember 4,2023 at 1:23PM UTC

   I'm sorry, but desensitizing someone with PTSD is not a method that works. It only extends or exacerbates the trauma that generates the startle response. The only thing you can do for someone like this is to identify the triggers and build coping mechanisms for managing the triggers. I have been in treatment for PTSD for almost 20 years, and it wasn't until we identified one of my most significant triggers that I was able to begin to manage them. The response often has nothing to do with the trigger. They certainly didn't in my case.

4. AnonymousNovember 4,2023 at 4:46PM UTC

   So I’m clear, because desensitization didn’t work for you it’s not an option for anyone?

5. AnonymousNovember 5,2023 at 3:18PM UTC

   I have a master's degree in counseling, and no, desensitizing techniques are not a therapeutic trauma protocol. More often than not, it exacerbates symptoms rather than "desensitizes" the client.

6. AnonymousNovember 2,2023 at 2:46PM UTC

   I worked with someone who struggled with this exact same response and we accommodated him with a.work space away from distraction and triggers.
   The workspace was at the back of the large open area against a wall and behind a pony/half wall. This allowed him to work undistracted and in a makeshift quiet cubicle. We would message him on teams if we needed to meet so that he had a warning. It didn't alleviate all the startle response but he said it helped him tremendously. He said his comfort level at work increased.

7. Sherice StewartNovember 3,2023 at 12:00AM UTC

   Would you feel comfortable actually classifying it as a workplace accommodation? Everyone has the right to workplace accommodations.

8. AnonymousNovember 3,2023 at 2:24PM UTC

   I have a hearing loss and when someone walks up behind me they startle me because I can't hear them coming.

   In my workplace, I have always just explained it to my bosses with little fanfare and let them know the reason I jump. Sometimes, they react oddly (I once had a boss think the solution was to flag me down like an airplane on approach) but in general, it has always been better to just be up front about it, rather than worry if they understand for me.

9. AnonymousNovember 3,2023 at 2:47PM UTC

   Check out the non-profit RecoveryInternational.org. They teach cognitive-behavioral techniques through Zoom and phone meetings, 7 days a week. There is no charge -- donations only if you can. They focus on reactions to everyday events -- like you describe -- and have helped many with PTSD develop better symptom management with time and practice. They've been around since 1937. It works. Good luck!

10. amanda casertaNovember 3,2023 at 4:33PM UTC

    Um, you're describing a "real"/physical medical issue. I'm not a psychiatrist, but Propanolol XR helped this a lot for me. It suppresses the vagus nerve. Also, a very small dosage is often used for "smaller" anxiety for pre-presentation jitters. Just a BP medication in certain dosages, not really habit forming.

11. AnonymousNovember 4,2023 at 1:11PM UTC

    I liked the one who suggested rearranging your workspace to ensure you are in the back of a room so you have a full range of view of anyone coming in. I have to be situated in a room with a clear path to the exit to control my anxiety, and the bigger the room or the gathering, the more important this is. Please discuss this with your supervisor in general terms, as you don't have to disclose your illness unless it is necessary for the accommodation. You can describe it as a rather severe "startle response," and you need not have anyone come up behind you to control it. I have PTSD, and I try not to disclose it unless the situation becomes unbearable and I have no other option. There is too much stigma attached to PTSD, and people tend to be afraid of people with it.

12. AnonymousNovember 4,2023 at 1:25PM UTC

    this also sounds like the sort of interest deep engagement that occurs with ADHD and autism. I'm not saying you have either, but it's not uncommon for ADHD and/or Autism to also be diagnosed with only PTSD. The PTSD often exists but doesn't explain why you jump when it comes to engagement.

13. AnonymousNovember 5,2023 at 6:41PM UTC

    Armchair diagnosis of a complete stranger on a job board.

14. AnonymousNovember 6,2023 at 1:27PM UTC

    Anon- did you actually read my comment? I said, specifically, "I'm not saying you have either" - followed by two facts. If I wasn't clear enough, I was implying and am now saying is that it's an avenue worth exploring if the OP feels it might be warranted. My background, which is relevant: As a 48 yo woman who has been diagnosed with CPTSD, bipolar, and a couple of other things, the ADHD diagnosis came this year ---no one thought it could be ADHD because it didn't fit under old understandings (hyperactive boys etc). Same with Autism, which I am set to begin my own official diagnosis journey after several late-diagnosed friends and a professional suggested this might explain other "clusters of quirks". No one of those people "armchair" diagnosed me, but they, similar to what I am doing now, pointed out that some things (like the startling at deep engagement/focus on something--which I do, often dramatically), aren't explained by the diagnoses I've received. And by the way, being startled at deep focus isn't by itself a sign of any diagnosis. The fact that OP already said she was diagnosed with PTSD says a lot. Otherwise, I wouldn't have mentioned ADHD or anything of the sort in my original comment. Now that new research is coming out, the awareness of the different manifestations of neurodiverse people is growing rapidly.

15. AnonymousNovember 7,2023 at 1:10PM UTC

    If it's possible for you to let your senior management know that you struggle with PTSD, they might be more supportive. I think a simple "I'm easily startled" reply to someone when you are startled is enough of an explanation. I also have CPTSD and when highly triggered or hyper vigilant it's more noticeable to others, but i wouldn't try to explain too much. Whatever else works to make you comfortable is OK, good luck to you. Also, outside of PTSD therapy (mine is $$$ too) i have joined some online groups and that has opened up so many other resources, all very helpful.

16. Kimberly AnneNovember 7,2023 at 2:35PM UTC

    When I opened up about my adhd I was then treated terribly, so much that I had to quit.

17. AnonymousNovember 7,2023 at 2:46PM UTC

    This is me!
    I completely relate. I always keep a mirror at my desk so I can see who's behind me. It also helps when I'm on the phone speaking with difficult clients so I can remember to watch my facial expressions which will translate through my tone.