I am trying to figure out how to navigate a new job with ADHD.

Anonymous

August 30,2023 at 1:20PM UTC

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I am trying to figure out how to navigate a new job with ADHD. I was officially diagnosed recently, in middle age and it made me happy in that it explained SO many things. Despite the diagnosis I managed to keep a job as the assistant director of a academic program for 20 years before it was closed during the pandemic,. But now I’m worried. I pivoted to a tech job and lost it after 10 months. I was a department manager and they didn’t think I trained my team well. It was a pretty toxic work environment and I was not well suited to it. So now I’ve pivoted back to education and received an offer for job similar to the one I had before with more responsibility and a much bigger department. But I am terrified I will blow this opportunity. I think I was able to keep the job I loved for 20 years, because my colleagues were also my very dear friends who protected me to an extent.

In this new job, there will be no protection. I need to come up with systems and procedures that will keep my adhd symptoms at bay (procrastination, distraction, and missing details). I am excellent doing things I love, but not so much at stuff I hate.

I’m looking for advice from everyone but particularly from those with ADHD, who are unmedicated.

Thanks for reading this very long message!

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AnonymousAugust 30,2023 at 4:41PM UTC
I have ADHD, and I've lead teams as big as 50 and as small as 1. If you LOVE what you're doing, you can find strategies to make it work. Just listen and have empathy.
Tech teams can also speak a much different language than other people, and that can be a struggle for any person, but especially one with difficulty recognizing social queues. Find some additional education on communication styles and see if that helps you over come some of your imposter syndrome.
Work on leaning into what you're good at, and finding systems for the things that you aren't. Calendars, digital communication, brightly colored folders, all things that can be super helpful. I also really like the planner that's made by Imperfect Inspiration. They are made for Neurodivergent people.
You can do this. You've done it before. One bad job doesn't undo all the good things you have going for you.
AnonymousAugust 30,2023 at 6:05PM UTC
Diagnosed about 10ish years ago, around the time I was 40 (finally gave a name to struggles I had since high school). Medicated for the first 6 years, and decided to go without for a few years. Long story short, medication definitely works for me. My question to you is why no medication? Have you tried this option? Are you not able to (if you really aren't able to, I am not wanting details)? But if you just aren't wanting to medicate because of the stigma you perceive, I beg you to reconsider. After being a few years unmedicated, I see how much better I function with it (and it's trial and error figuring out exactly what works for me).
AnonymousAugust 30,2023 at 6:52PM UTC
I want medication but since moving out of state I can’t find a doctor who will perscribe it. My struggles are being blamed on menopause even though I’ve had them my entire life. I’m hoping when I start the new job and get the better insurance I will have more options to choose from, Medicaid is pretty horrible when it comes to mental health.
AnonymousAugust 31,2023 at 9:39PM UTC
10 months to become proficient as a trainer in a job you're doing for the first time?
That was unrealistic on their part!
I have ADHD and work in academia. Even with prescriptions, I have to do without (as I am now) due to shortages.
Think of things you find difficult, and focus (heh) on finding external ways to get over the hump. Managers are usually either micromanagers for everything or for nothing, so I haven't had luck working with a boss to help me overcome this.
The office will make a big difference for you - if you can find a doctor (start looking NOW! Most have waitlists that are months-long), you may be able to get an accommodation for a quiet space that minimizes distractions.
Good luck!
AnonymousSeptember 3,2023 at 12:20AM UTC
As someone who is also neurodivergent, I would suggest looking into what your reasoning is for remaining unmedicated. I was helped enormously by medication. Unfortunately I could not bear the side effects. So I am also unmedicated, but not entirely by choice. As for the new job, start with giving yourself every small victory you can. The overwhelm will pass with time. I hope it goes well for you.
AnonymousSeptember 3,2023 at 6:19PM UTC
Not against medication at all my son is medicated. I just can’t get a prescription from my new doctor since I moved to a different state. They keep insisting that it’s menopause, even though I’ve had these symptoms my entire life.
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 12:37PM UTC
You should seek out a new doctor.
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 3:53PM UTC
The perimenopause makes adhd so much worse (the things no one tells us)! There are also apps (Plushcare, Talkiatry for example) that specifically focus on prescribing adhd meds and offer ongoing support. I’d never push meds on anyone but I was without for many years bc I also hated the side affects. It was going ruin my career if I didn’t do something about it (I was affected by tech layoffs and am building my own business now so no room for failure) so I made it my mission to work with a dr to find the best meds for me and I finally did find them and it’s been life changing. I’ve accomplished more in the few months since taking them than I have in a year. Don’t give up! You got this!
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 2:42PM UTC
I’m dealing with similar, only I am still in the job search phase and struggling with whether or not to report having a disability.
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 3:36PM UTC
I have one direct report that was recently diagnosed with ADHD and while looking into the best ways to tailor my management style to suit someone with ADHD I was recommended a work coach specific for those with ADHD. I am told by my direct report that this coach has been really helpful as they know how to address how it impacts their work on a day to day basis. Sometimes even really simple adjustments make a significant difference. So I would recommend the same to you, you have done the job before so I am sure you can do it, you might just need a little help addressing those issues such as procrastination and time organization. Your comment about doing things you love well and not those you hate is something I recognize on my direct report and not always a bad thing. My direct report is certainly my go to on the things they love as I know how good they are at it! All the best on your new job, you can do it and we all need a helping hand sometimes!
M BaazaSeptember 4,2023 at 5:00PM UTC
I'm curious though, how do meds help with things like procrastination, poor time management and memory?
I don't see how meds can help.in that area
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 6:11PM UTC
They help with all of the above! I’m not a medical expert so I’m sure I’m not describing to the full extent but essentially the meds regulate brain chemistry and then executive function kicks in and procrastination, poor time management and bad memory are reduced. I didn’t fully understand either until I stopped the meds (the classic one that made me feel so jittery I hated it) and then saw how they affected my life and career and then tried different ones until I found the right one for me and function so much better. It’s a big difference, not 100% but definitely much better than without meds. I’m so much more productive and able to push through more tasks that I was procrastinating and avoiding. That has improved my time management, etc etc. Its not an easy journey but it’s so worth it for many people.
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 1:39AM UTC
I know they were a miracle worker for my son, who was out of control there for a bit. It allowed him to focus, be less impulsive while maintaining his personality. It was after he started taking meds that the school discovered his dyslexia. Before, it was difficult to even test him.
AnonymousSeptember 8,2023 at 7:52PM UTC
Did you miss the part where they said they had ADHD, if you are interested, please look it up, we are not here for your education.
maria roseSeptember 4,2023 at 4:59PM UTC
You are facing 2 problems—perimenopause and getting a doctor to help you with medication to get you access to an ongoing treatment plan for ADHD. It’s bad enough that you have to deal with a changing physical body and have a sympathetic doctor who can help and also help treat you with if needed medication. Part of your problem was caused by finally getting diagnosed and moving to another state where (contrary to the illusion given us by ACA) treatment is not exactly the same and you are forced to restart with finding a supportive treatment plan by a supportive provider. But don’t discount at least learning coping strategies while waiting to get a prescription for a medication which are available in today’s age in online sites for your ADHD which will also help you deal with the physical symptoms of perimenopause which are real and not imagined hysteria of being a female. All is not lost, you just need to adapt and adjust and lower your tendency to stress into not having enough focus on the details that you think you need. You have already been doing it all along for 20 years before being diagnosed.
AnonymousSeptember 4,2023 at 5:38PM UTC
I dont have this issue but I can guide from and HR perspective. Take a deep breath and know that the last role was not right for you and maybe it was able to point you back to your base of experience and a renewed love for it. As for new people and working through, compartmentalize the things you do well. Create a tracker for the things you don't love and then timebox what you need to do in those situations and give yourself personal deadlines with some allowances for slippage where it won't break things. Break down tasks into pieces and use a calendar and some sort of workflow program (lots of free ones out there- like Monday is a good one) and use that to maintain the details. If and when you need breaks take them to empty your mind and just find a zen moment to clear. You might be one that is monoprocessing vs multitasking and if that is your mode then be sure you see things to each end. You got this! Good luck in the new job.
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 1:16AM UTC
Thanks so much, this is really helpful. I have been searching for project management software to use-something that marks milestones, deadlines etc. and prioritizes tasks. I have not heard the term monoprocessing before, but that is exactly how I work, so I need to use timers. I've also started meditation which has helped with sleep, I like the idea of using it for work. So it sounds like I'm on the right track!
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 1:26AM UTC
Glad I could be helpful!
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 1:31PM UTC
I have ADHD and am in my 50s, diagnosed 18 years ago. I definitely recommend working with an ADHD coach! Remote coaching is available, take the time to find a ADHD coach who you connect with. Read books, google, and do a honest self-assessment. Wishing you the best of luck.
Paula ReichwaldSeptember 5,2023 at 2:42PM UTC
I have ADHD and a software engineer and have never been on medication. I regard my ADHD as my superpower. You have to figure out what works for you, but I have lots of little tricks to keep myself organized and on task. I actually start my day with a quick phone game, that is relaxing but it gives me insight into how well my attention is for the day and I go from there. There are browser extenstions that will help block out external noise etc. The big thing is to recognize yourself honestly and work with yourself instead of trying to force yourself to conform to other's work habits. I find that if I am distractible, I give myself permission to be distracted as long as I do one task. That usually gets me excited about the task and I end up focusing and getting things done. If I am having a bad day with my focus, I give myself easier tasks and just recognize that tomorrow I will do better. I have always been a top performer and usually my managers will work with me because they realize how much I bring to the table. I agree with the others, the previous job did not sound like a good fit. Good luck!
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 5:06PM UTC
It sounds like you're committed to being effective and productive in your work. There are all sorts of tools and tricks out there and finding ones that fit your style can make all the difference in the world. Coaching is a great resource, as is therapy to an extent, esp. when you're dealing with the anxiety and worry about having this diagnosis and succeeding in aspects of your future. There are many sites on the web; there's an especially helpful online pub called ADDitude Magazine--useful info in there. Moreover, employers and employees can access the Job Accommodation Network, JAN, that suggests ADA accommodations for a variety of limiting conditions, including ADHD. Offered here in hopes that you may find it useful for yourself or when you and your employer discuss anything ADHD-related that may come up. Google job accommodation network or JAN and then search there on ADHD.
All the best to you!
AnonymousSeptember 5,2023 at 9:27PM UTC
Ok this is a very small piece of advice, but it’s worked me wonders! At work I always take really good notes, and highlight to-dos in orange. I always go back to those notes to make sure all orange is crossed, meaning i did it. And I do it with something as big as a report or as simple as sending an email. As of procrastination I don’t really have advice, bc as big of a procrastinator I am in my personal life, that is absolutely a NO at work. What I make sure I do if I decide to do X thing later, is to write it on my notebook and highlight it in orange ?
AnonymousSeptember 8,2023 at 7:58PM UTC
I have ADHD. I found that ADHD medications did not work for me, but anti-depressants did, especially with running thoughts and being able to focus. Medication is a personal choice, and I did not get the right medication on the first try, but I do know that they have helped me so much. Also, think of how you managed before knowing your diagnosis. Having a diagnosis can be extremely helpful when helping to explain your situation to others, but don't let it bring you down. Think of all the positives! Are there negative aspects of ADHD sometimes? Sure! But because I lose focus, I also have the best notes, calendar dates, and organization. I need to, because with out it I can't succeed. Use it to motivate you and realize that being that way is not a burden, but just a different way of seeing the world. Then you can control it rather than it controlling you! Best of luck!