I came here hoping to find a spark of solidarity, a chorus of shared outrage against the injustices we face at work.

Anonymous

January 26,2024 at 4:43PM UTC

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I came here hoping to find a spark of solidarity, a chorus of shared outrage against the injustices we face at work.

Instead, I'm met with comments that make my blood simmer.

Folks, calling yourselves colleagues while parroting corporate propaganda like "employees are always wrong" and "reasonable accommodations are handouts"? That ain't gonna earn you a pat on the head from your boss. You aren't getting a gold star for saying that here!!!

Look around! We've all seen it happen – good people, skilled and dedicated, tossed aside like yesterday's trash by bad companies and even worse managers. Sure, some decent workplaces exist, but they're oases in a desert of exploitation. We can't keep clinging to mirages while the BS is right outside our own window.

If we want a damn oasis for every worker, we need to stop singing along to the oppressor's tune and start building a dam against their greed. Lives are at stake here, lives with messy realities that don't bend to the whims of corporate calendars. Not everyone can just waltz out and into a new job at the snap of a finger.

So, instead of cozying up to upper management, consider the strength in your fellow worker's hand. Together, we can be a damn mountain range, unyielding and immovable against their exploitation. This isn't a TED Talk, it's a wake-up call.

Let's build a community where we roar for each other, where fair treatment isn't a dream, but a right we fight for, tooth and nail, until every worker has a place to stand tall and breathe free.

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AnonymousJanuary 26,2024 at 4:47PM UTC
VERY MUCH AGREED! Thank you!!
Kimberley Ferretti HammettJanuary 26,2024 at 6:30PM UTC
I feel so much of this. I have been getting a general sense of uneasiness from many comments on here.. while there is quite a bit of support present.. there are also a lot of rude comments or unhelpful comments. I'm not sure how this has cultivated but it's frustrating.
I would also add to this, though, I think a healthy degree of self-reliance is so important in this vein. Like you say, not everyone can walk away at the snap of a finger, however, in order to hold corporations to our standards, we take on an element of risk that would be more tolerable if we could. So I just want to express that I think one way we can begin to change the corporate environments is learning ways to be more self-reliant and capable of earning income in a changing market so that when push comes to shove, and it could come to shove, we could handle the company saying "oh none of you are gonna play our games? We can afford to start over, can you?".
And I'm hear roaring with you! We all deserve to be sustained by our income, not a slave to it. The future of work is going to look so different and I hope to have a positive impact on that. I hope all of us can.. without tearing our hair out lol
AnonymousJanuary 26,2024 at 6:32PM UTC
Coming up to senior management is a terrible idea! I just lost a job of ten years because I contacted HR about the nonsense they do! It backfired big time and they made my life so miserable by lying and writing me up for the most ridiculous things I’ve ever seen. They’re fully aware I have a medical condition, ADDHD, and they pushed all the right buttons! My condition never caused me issues until that happened! It threw my anxiety into full throttle, and I couldn’t take it anymore, ultimately I had to quit! They DO use this stuff against you, they ALWAYS have each others backs, and you… the employee, have zero power to stop them! They are not your friend!!
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 1:27PM UTC
I fully agree
Once you reach senior management the politics are intense, and male dominated industries are quite cut throat and exclusionary to women.
I quit in July 2023 for the reason of politics and poor ethics. Now completing a masters in a different field and found a health shop I'm considering running. Let's hope we prosper in our own way!
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 2:47PM UTC
Agree ? with what you just said! I did the same thing about a coworker and it backfired. Instead of manager talking to the coworker individually they met with the both of us (told us it was for something else) and when we showed up for the meeting prepared to discuss something legit, the manager basically said, you both have brought it to my attention that you aren’t getting along, duke it out right here, right now. I was blindsided and totally unprepared. I was nervous and sometimes when I get nervous the tears come (thanks menopause). After the meeting I didn’t feel any better than I did before it. I also had a target on my back. Two weeks later said coworker sent me a slack. I responded in a tone that he took offense to and tattled on me. I got punished severely. I got two departments taken away, my hours cut and my one work from home day I now have to come into the office.
Needless To say I’m looking for another job but at 55 it isn’t easy.
AnonymousJanuary 26,2024 at 8:25PM UTC
I'm not sure what you're referring to, but I wanted to say thank you to all that took the time to comment to my post about being terminated by a new manager with no warning, etc. I'm so grateful to have this group of women who have provided me excellent advice and resources.
I'm sorry that you feel differently.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 1:33PM UTC
Is it outrage because people aren’t saying what you want to hear? Some of us have years and years of experience and have seen how things play out.
My husband was injured on the job. They forced him to retire although he should have been able to go back to work. We talked to an attorney. He told us we could fight it to reinstate his job and they would look for any reason at all to write him up and terminate him with no settlement or we could take the settlement and draw disability and/or find different work. It wasn’t what we wanted to hear but it wasn’t bad advice.
managers hate it when you go over their heads. Of course they are going to pretend things that you are bringing up are going to change. On the other side, you have put a target on your back for them to watch every move you make to be written up, disciplined, and eventually terminated. It will not be for what your original concern was.
As much as we would like to think differently, HR is not there to protect the worker, they are there to protect the company. They want to make sure everything is done by the book to avoid future lawsuits. If HR overrides management, it is to save the company, it is not for you.
I am really sorry you didn’t feel supported by the comments. However life isn’t always pretty. I personally appreciate different views and scenarios that others have experienced.
Good luck. I hope you find the answers you are looking for.
Maggie StoneJanuary 27,2024 at 1:33PM UTC
I see your point. I have definitely seen comments that are not supportive. I have also seen posts that are biased, don’t make sense, or don’t include the whole story. I think in online forums it is easy to be more blunt or harsh than we normally would be. I think everyone should imagine that that person is there in front of them and post accordingly.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 1:45PM UTC
Business is business - it’s not about you, it’s about the bottom line. Make your waves, but remember, there are a line of people waiting to take your job.
Might it not be better to do your job, do it well, and get promoted so you can make the changes you think you want on your way up the ladder?
Remember - you get more bees with honey.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 2:31PM UTC
I shouldn't have to climb a corporate ladder so that I can get the accomodations I need to do my job without being treated poorly or like I'm getting a "handout".
I'm an engineer, I like doing technical work. I have zero interest in becoming a project manager or people manager. I do my best everyday. It shouldn't take "wait til you're in management" to improve my work environment.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 2:43PM UTC
Not every position has a path to advancement.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 3:17PM UTC
Honestly, this is what they want you to believe and exactly what they want you to say. Why can’t we all come together to raise the baseline treatment of all employees, why is that bad and against the business is business mentality? Many other countries, thriving ones at that, do both to protect the worker and succeed in business goals. But I guess the ‘we’re all just a cog in the wheel and another one is right behind to step in’ mentality works. It’s just inhumane and people
are tired of it.
AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 12:44AM UTC
LOL. *snorts* This is the funniest post I’ve read all day. You win the internet for today.
Sue Gordon- retired Career CoachJanuary 27,2024 at 1:56PM UTC
Ouch. And you begin your post by slamming the community. I have not found this to be a place that spouts “employees are always wrong”. I’ve seen tremendous support for those in terrible and abusive situations. I’ve also seen sage advice when perhaps a poster needs to look within. True I’ve seen snark and meanness as well. But this is the internet, where anonymity protects the mean. It is both unacceptable while at the same time it is to be expected. It doesn’t mean this community supports the oppressor. It means that some individuals are mean.
It sounds like you posted and got pushback that you disagree with. Perhaps some reflection on those comments (the well-meaning, not the mean), is in order.
Monica Alvarez-CunninghamJanuary 27,2024 at 9:54PM UTC
I agree with OP. Sure, on the rare occasion the situation warrants what you’re calling for. However, in most cases, I’m appalled by the responses when someone is looking for (and deserving of) empathy.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 11:29PM UTC
Take this site for what it is: 99% anonymous going off on a few paragraphs of what YOU choose to illustrate. We don't know your story- except for what you tell us.
You are NOT obligated to stay; a few times, I have come and gone myself.
We all have different opinions and experiences. We are compassionate but also TRY to give advice.
At the end of the day, do what is right for YOUR life. No one (including myself ) is 100% wrong or 100% right ...welcome to life.
Make a decision YOU are COMFORTABLE with and move on accordingly
Lorraine HerreraJanuary 27,2024 at 2:13PM UTC
I didn’t see your previous post, I’m sorry for those discouraging responses. Now, the only reason I still have a career is because accommodations exist, is our right to work and earn a living even when our circumstances are different. I live with disabilities, had a very invasive brain surgery just two years ago, I fight for my accommodations because it is my right andI know I can perform my work, I just function different. Having accommodations is not a handout, we have to do all the work that is expected for our position. If we do not fulfill our responsibilities we can be fired because of undue hardship. Whoever thinks is “easier” is just showing pure ignorance and is evident they haven’t read the law. People that need accommodations are people that are choosing to stay in the workforce and be productive members of our society even when they are dealing with heavy stuff these other people can’t even imagine.
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 5:23AM UTC
Exactly!
GirlBossanova934974January 27,2024 at 2:17PM UTC
My response? Take a look around! Employee turnover has NEVER been higher! It is clear that people are NOT waiting around for lousy companies to change the ways they are doing things! My case is not an exception. I parted my ways with my former company last July. Since the beginning of the year, i have seen an avalanche of job postings from my former company on LinkedIn and Indeed. Gee! I guess the turnover is really getting started now. They are running for the exits! All the short term fixes and gimmicks have failed! The company's latest attempt to recruit? A not so catchy video on LinkedIn telling the world how great they are with a few catchy slogans......You can't make this stuff up!
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 2:33PM UTC
That’s kind of what the internet chorus does though - attack, attack, attack.
Armchair critics who always know better.
I recently posted on a different job site geared towards people in my profession about my micromanaging boss and the other oddities of my job, which, having been in my profession for over a decade, I know are oddities/irregularities that wouldn’t fly elsewhere , and I got probably 40 people outright attacking me (telling me it was my fault, telling me im incompetent) with no mercy or understanding before I deleted the post
I don’t know what to say other than the Internet is a really mean place and people really feel the right to let loose with their ugly side.
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 5:21AM UTC
I 100% agree with you that the Internet is a really mean place and people feel the right to let loose with their ugly side. Unfortunately I see it here a lot. The internet, like when driving, gives people the buffer to be able to say the unkind things they would never actually say to someone's face.
KathyJanuary 27,2024 at 2:48PM UTC
I agree with others that social media sites have their share of snarky people with their snarky comments and of course the more nasty are usually posted anonymously.
I attribute some of the really snarky comments to people who are early in their careers and have not experienced any negative outcomes in their jobs and think it will never happen to them.
As you know, many of the corporate overlords have a slash and burn method of using up people and throwing them away when they start to make 'too much money' or age out to be over 40.
I live in a small city where getting a new job in my field is almost impossible due to the lack of opportunity. Remote is the only option and there is lot of competition for remote positions.
The corporate overlords wants to keep up scratching and fighting for our jobs since it benefits them in the long run.
I do believe the so called lack of innovation is due to that cavalier attitude that experienced people are expendable and replacing them with a cheaper, younger person generates the same outcomes.
In the world of software development we liken that to idea that if the project is behind managers want to add more people even though adding more people slows down the project due to the required training period for any new people.
It's the idea that since it takes 9 months for one woman to have a baby we can replace her with 9 women and have that baby in one month. It never works. ?
Resist taking those negative comments to heart.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 2:54PM UTC
Being in the workforce for decades has shown me
just how horrible and brutal corporate America has become. The management is garbage and everyone wants more without pushing their workers like
slaves. Managers and ceo alike are treating their workers that make the money for them with belligerence, demeaning insults and no care for the other humans mental health. All to make someone else rich and we can’t even afford rent and food! It’s disgusting and I agree - something MIST change!! Too many of our children are graduating with useless degrees after putting themselves in hundreds of thousands of dollars of debt and STILL can’t land a job! Companies looking to save a buck are hiring non-citizens so they can abuse them and pay them nothing. We don’t need to only worry about AI losing our jobs - we need to worry about the ceo and rich monsters that care nothing of you!
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 7:59PM UTC
I don’t see enough people talking about this. I graduated from college and entered the corporate workforce in the late 90s, and the decline in work environments in the past ~20 years or so has been astounding. Companies used to offer things like health insurance options with NO deductible, decent 401k matching, and tuition reimbursement for work-related classes as STANDARD benefits. A lot of that disappeared in the post-9/11 recession, and what didn’t disappear then, disappeared with the 2008 recession. Heck, I even had friends whose companies paid for their MBAs and law degrees as long as they agreed to continue to work for the company for X number of years after graduation.
In 2023, people are still expected to show this sort of loyalty to companies, but we’re given crap raises that don’t even keep up with the increases in our healthcare premiums, cattle pen work environments where we practically sit on top of each other, and can be laid off on a whim…all because these days most companies value “shareholder value” even more than they value putting out a good product, let alone treating their employees like human beings.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 3:29PM UTC
I’m in agreement with you for the most part.
one thing I constantly see is ‘a job can fire you for any reason’.
They can’t. And people need to stop believing that. There’s a reason you can sue for wrongful termination.
TrishJanuary 28,2024 at 4:08AM UTC
Ever heard of "at will"? They can and do terminate without reason. Read the fine print. When you accept " at will" employment, you agree to those terms. Wrongful termination suits take years to settle and rarely are in favor of the employee. Also, most cases are dropped because one cannot afford legal fees for years. I'd love to see a non profit legal team of women who will take these cases and actually get some justice!
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 3:50PM UTC
My aunt is attorney, and my mentor is leadership in HR. No, you can’t fire anyone for any reason. Maybe you should do some research on the ‘fine print’.
TrishJanuary 30,2024 at 3:18AM UTC
I'm guessing your aunt is not a labor attorney. I didn't need to do research as I have two employment offer letters that both state (among other contingencies) - "In all cases, employment is at-will and both you and "stated company" have the right to end the employment relationship at any time, for any reason." Perhaps you should do your research and not just name drop.
AnonymousFebruary 4,2024 at 7:33PM UTC
It really depends. "At will" does not apply to an employer firing a worker for a number of things. They don't have to list a reason but if the former employee has proof of being fired for one of these reasons, they can and should fight back.
AnonymousFebruary 6,2024 at 5:36PM UTC
The exact definition of 'at will' is as follows per the NCSL website... https://www.ncsl.org/labor-and-employment/at-will-employment-overview
"At-Will Defined:
At-will means that an employer can terminate an employee at any time for any reason, except an illegal one, or for no reason without incurring legal liability. Likewise, an employee is free to leave a job at any time for any or no reason with no adverse legal consequences."
You're going off of the first half of the definition. You have no idea what you're talking about.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 3:47PM UTC
This forum used to be an awesome place to vent and get solid advice but now it’s full of corporate bootlickers and people’s terrible managers. This just isn’t the platform it used to be sadly.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 3:53PM UTC
Well let’s make it great again. Bring solutions. Share your war stories and put sad faced emojis when you think someone is spouting corp rhetoric and add your truth.
Monica Alvarez-CunninghamJanuary 27,2024 at 4:08PM UTC
Wow, thank you for saying this. I wholeheartedly agree.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 4:22PM UTC
Everyone is looking out for number one and solidarity stops as soon as people’s livelihoods are on the line. There is no recourse for workplace bullying, corporations have legal teams in place to ensure they can exploit you just to the point of it being legally defensible. Until all individuals have protected status, there will never be a true solution or true “equity” - which I’ve come to understand is a mere excuse to underpay qualified individuals by misclassifying them under too broad position descriptions. I could go on and on, but they will get away with what they know how to get away with.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 4:47PM UTC
Amen! I was just terminated from my position as Chief of Staff to the CEO. The basis of the claim was I added my domestic partner to my health plan even though we aren’t legally married. He said it was insurance fraud even though I had taken her off my insurance during the open enrollment period. The company kept billing me for it. There was no discussion with me. I was let go, even though I had given my heart to the organization and to trying to rebuild community trust in it.
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 8:44PM UTC
That's terrible, and I'm sorry that happened to you. This kind of thing does not surprise me in our current world.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 5:18PM UTC
I haven't left one job by choice. I've been in the tech industry for ten years and it's always been layoffs of large parts of the company. At this point I've lost any trust or hope with upper management.
AnonymousJanuary 27,2024 at 8:11PM UTC
Yes! Exactly this.
They keep talking about a recession to make people scared and to give employers an excuse to enact hiring freezes. F that. Let’s all sllllooooow dooowwwn until they’re forced to start hiring. Until they’re forced to make salaries reasonable for the economic realities we’re living in.
we’re all in this together— let’s act like it.
LORI-ANN BURLINGAMEJanuary 27,2024 at 8:34PM UTC
With over 35-years of expeirence in the busines world, I am not suprised by what you are saying. However, talk is cheap and many people have a good marketing campaign but want to ride on someone else's coattail. After all, making changes is difficult. What have you done to put your "words" into practice.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 2:38AM UTC
What are you talking about Lori-Ann?!?! This post is slamming people like you on this site who focus the entirety and blame onto how individual people aren't being responsible enough and not pulling themselves up by the bootstraps to be humiliated at an org whenever C-suites please.
Is there a marketing campaign attached here? Do you see a way OP is trying to monetize on this? lol what a joke... Stop bringing your bad attitude here and on this site.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 10:35PM UTC
Agree!! I slugged it out for over a decade at a company and was a fair dissenting and advocating voice, not extreme. It was either to support leadership fully or leave the company. I left. It was a solid job that I mostly enjoyed but was committed to improving the culture with employee feedback as guidance balanced with the business and fiscal realities. Some of the biggest hurdles were employee fear and HR.
Gerri StiffarmJanuary 27,2024 at 11:46PM UTC
Which country??
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 1:02PM UTC
Those comments are from HR reps who frequent this site. Remember they are not on your side and will protect the company for money. Ignore them, the jig is up we know what they are about. Exclude them in your life.
Kristie WhiteJanuary 28,2024 at 4:01PM UTC
Who do you work for for money?
Monica Alvarez-CunninghamJanuary 28,2024 at 8:01PM UTC
Then the titles really should be changed to more accurately represent your role, if it’s not, in fact, “human resources.”
Kristie WhiteJanuary 28,2024 at 10:47PM UTC
I'm not really sure what you mean here. HR works with the "human" resources of the organization. And humans are inconsistent, sometimes honorable and sometimes mean, sometimes high performing and sometimes lazy. And most of the time, all in the same person just depending on what day. It's unfair to blame HR for all the things that happen within an organization. At the end of the day, each of us have to take responsibility for our individual behavior. The organization is going to make decisions based on cashflow, not people. I've been in the pool that was laid off. I've been in the toxic management environment more than once. Life is a never ending negotiation.
AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 12:40PM UTC
Oh Kristie, so you are saying HR doesn’t lie about innocent loyal high performers who are cut due to profits of the company being effected in someway or another by that employee earning pay increases ? And when they speak up about being replaced with someone earning significantly less than they did HR is corrupt and corporate’s puppet. You sabatoge others to protect your payout/salary and the company’s greed. Quit trying to use a smoke screen to legitimize your behavior. Those who know, know. I’ve seen the things HR submits/claims in court documents to aid in the silencing and cover up of company’s horrible treatment of people trying to make a living in this society.
Kristie WhiteJanuary 30,2024 at 7:05PM UTC
I'm saying stop generalizing.
Each individual makes a decision about their own behavior and those that work in HR are no different than any other department. There are good, honorable people and there are people that only do what is politically correct. Having been on the wrong side of politics more than once myself, I know both sides. Stop acting as though HR is the only place that allows corrupt management or supports bad behavior. We aren't. But we are in the spotlight. HR isn't ALL bad and your side isn't ALL good either.
asmith13January 31,2024 at 9:33PM UTC
*eye roll* HR is not the enemy, folks.
AnonymousFebruary 1,2024 at 8:02PM UTC
HR works for the company, not the employee.
asmith13February 2,2024 at 9:21PM UTC
We receive our paycheck from the company but also have an ethical duty to do the right thing. We can be sued personally for unethical practices so like---it is in our best interest to not do those things. We are literally the liaison between employees and managers and it is our job to make sure the rights of both are balanced in a way that is both legally and ethically responsible.
Walk a mile in our shoes before you make these general comments.
Kristie WhiteJanuary 28,2024 at 4:01PM UTC
I have never seen the comments you mention. But over and over I see comments about how HR is terrible, don’t listen to them, they work for te company for money. And I always want to scream “just who do you work for?!” Here’s the thing…business is about money and can often be exploitative. Good HR people try to ensure workers receive what they are legally entitled to as well as fairness and good management. But it’s not fair to lay all of bad human behavior at our feet. I believe in capitalism because there is more opportunity to elevate yourself and create positive energy for others. There are obstacles to self-actuation in all systems. So I believe focusing on our own personal behavior is the first place to start.
Monica Alvarez-CunninghamJanuary 28,2024 at 8:00PM UTC
Sure, self-reflection is definitely the first place to start. But, toxic workplaces and toxic managers exist. I think the trend on here, as of late, has been to defend employers treating people unfairly, and accuse/assume the employees of being the problem. There’s data out there supporting that bad managers and bad work environments exist.
Kristie WhiteJanuary 28,2024 at 10:42PM UTC
I completely agree having experienced bad managers many times myself. I guess my point is that HR can't control human behavior. Until the leadership of organizations can be convinced to hold bad managers accountable through some form of 360 feedback from those they manage, it is very difficult to gain support for disciplinary action. And as I have experienced, sometimes the bad manager is your VP of HR. So my point is that blaming HR as though we are the evil inside keeping the organization in power is to deny that we all have a job to do for which we get paid a salary. Just like in any other department, there are some very empathetic high quality people in HR and some duds.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 8:06PM UTC
My interpretation of what you said is:
You need money and therefore you will be exploited by employers.
This is due to capitalism.
But capitalism has created undefined opportunity (to spend most of your life in an exploitative environment apparently but also .... ?)
Actuate yourselves! Focus on personal behavior! You are within the system, what else can you do.
Cue the great resignation, mental illness, suicide etc etc.
Thanks HR. Apologies for being direct
AnonymousJanuary 28,2024 at 6:22PM UTC
No, I have always added her to my insurance policies. And have never had any issues. The CEO is the one who said to add my family to my policy… and as it is, I took her off. They shouldn’t have billed me at all for her…
Dawn PerkinsJanuary 29,2024 at 4:21PM UTC
I agree completely.
EMILY KIKUE FRANKJanuary 29,2024 at 4:55PM UTC
*applause*
AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 9:31PM UTC
Curious what you are basing this entire post upon.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 2:45AM UTC
My sister in Christ - the entire point of this post is for people to stop attacking each other while siding with corporations... did you even read the whole thing?
People can't just up and quit... that is the point being made. Saying "it's just that simple period" is placing the blame on the individual worker and letting bad companies get off scot free. I'm sorry Argentina was a bad experience for you but imagine someone telling you that it couldn't have been that bad because you didn't try to start your own company.
Do you see what I'm saying here? Every situation is different. Many americans aren't close to living the dream. Why are you standing in the way of people trying to make it better? Why are you siding with companies? DO YOU THINK YOUR BOSS WILL SEE THIS AND GIVE YOU A RAISE?!?!?
AnonymousFebruary 6,2024 at 5:33PM UTC
Keep religion out of these posts. It's a trigger for many, and unnecessary.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 7:58PM UTC
The easiest way to get into upper management is to drink the cool aid, else lie on a daily basis. Senior management that I have experienced is political and you need to believably enforce the party line. People say you progress to your skill level, I feel that once you reach senior its about your skill in people manipulation, or people skills. But I worked in a male dominated engineering environment.
AnonymousJanuary 31,2024 at 3:57PM UTC
I so agree, I've been at the top levels of management and it was always exhausting. Not because of the work, because I liked that part, but being asked to consistently compromise my values or what I believed was the right thing. Then subsequently had them try to convince me of the direction or be told to fall in line. My values are simple and ones most people have, I am not a radical. But perhaps after leaving my last job, I've now become radicalized because I've never witnessed manipulation or conniving like that before and it really changed me.
AnonymousFebruary 1,2024 at 8:40PM UTC
Yes. I have become very feminist and anticapitalist due to what I saw in my male dominated engineering environment. I ascribe it to masculine values. Was your company also male dominated? By masculine values I mean misogyny- a woman will not outcompete no matter what
Territoriality, competitiveness, low empathy, narcissism. But I was also brought up muslim, with sex segregation. I was friendly with any muslim women, but only men of the family for my childhood and teens. So maybe it's my unique experience that leads me to make such generalizations. The contrast between dynamics in male only groups and female only groups (of all cultures and races) is extreme for me.
I have left engineering now to try start my own business, do consulting and finish my masters.
AnonymousFebruary 4,2024 at 2:06AM UTC
Yes, I feel the exact same way about feminism and anti-capitalism. My past workplaces
have been fairly balanced on gender. But yes to lots of masculine values. I do believe capitalism inherently relies on the structures of misogyny and patriarchy to work. I’ve also left to work as a consultant, it’s been better to help in finding people to work with who hold similar values, I realized I need the flexibility.
AnonymousJanuary 30,2024 at 10:27PM UTC
Completely, I posted something with some similar themes and it's just gone, I think it was removed within an hour. It was respectful but asked similar questions. Frustrating.
LORI-ANN BURLINGAMEJanuary 31,2024 at 5:21PM UTC
You are very SELF-RIGHTEOUS -- stand on that SOAP BOX!
Supporting each other means meeting deadlines; being a proactive participate on projects and other team related events; refrining from gossiping and backstabbing; being aware and helping others in need. It does not inlcude CARRYING ANYONE ELSE ON YOUR BACK TO THE FINISH LINE.
AnonymousJanuary 31,2024 at 6:47PM UTC
Lori-Ann, sister, sit down. You are having a conversation and a fight in your own head. The things you are commenting on aren’t in this post.
Standing up and choosing to fight injustice, to be sympathetic, empathetic and wanting for the base line of work treatment to be risen doesn’t mean carrying anyone on your back. It isn’t entitlement to want for better and I’m truly sorry the world put you in a place where you think others deserve to suffer because you did.
Get off the internet baby, do something for you and please start being kinder to yourself.
AnonymousFebruary 1,2024 at 8:05PM UTC
I wish we could start a union. I thought about it many times but don't know where to start. The "at will" employment is horrible. Employees get laid off for all sorts of reasons, not always good. In many companies, assistants are treated like second class citizens. Things aren't what they used to be.
AnonymousFebruary 2,2024 at 11:34AM UTC
I really recommend looking into joining International Industrial Workers of the World (The One Big Union).
It is very inexpensive to join. They have all kinds of resources about starting a union at your workplace available. The people involved are very passionate about this and will often jump at the chance to help out a fellow worker looking to organize their workplace as well.
AnonymousFebruary 2,2024 at 5:52PM UTC
Thanks for the information.
AnonymousFebruary 2,2024 at 3:14PM UTC
Yikes, I think we could say your patriarchal tendencies are showing. Obviously, I agree with the person you're responding to. I have the same years of experience as you and I can see you're committed to the trench you've dug. I don't think anyone was talking about shirking responsibility but banding together against oppressive behaviors or systems and claiming the important contribution of being a worker or employee.
AnonymousFebruary 2,2024 at 8:42PM UTC
Me choosing to stay anonymous just proves my point of how toxic the workplace can be. I don't feel comfortable to express my true feelings without fear of retaliation.
I'm calling you sister because while you clearly don't realize it, we are all in it together. You choose to see me, anyone really, as an enemy when I am fighting for you, a stranger.
I don't want the world to be better for people I like or people I think "deserve" it. I want it to be better for the people I disagree with. Anyone who has a pulse, has a right to a respectful workplace and to earn a living with honor that covers more than just basic expenses.
Disagreeing with you isn't gaslighting you. Calling you out and explaining that you are off topic with your argument points is disagreeing.
Your hurt and pain is read in every word you are typing. I am sorry for that. I'm sorry your years of "experience" has been bitter and angry. You think I do not have the same experience because I do not share in your anger and pain but just like your talking points, here, you are completely wrong as well.
Good luck Lori-Ann, I hope the next 30+ years for you are better than the last ones have been.
LORI-ANN BURLINGAMEFebruary 8,2024 at 12:12AM UTC
I live in a world of BILLIONS, you live in a world of ONE. And, there is no communicae style that can bridge this gap. I feel sorry for you that you cannot see all of the great strides women have made and continue to make.
KathyAnn KrajcikFebruary 8,2024 at 10:50PM UTC
Everyone's experience is different.