Feeling sad after giving notice.

28 Comments

1. AnonymousNovember 29,2023 at 11:20PM UTC

   It's not uncommon to have some second thoughts. You made the decision, so unless they are trying to get you to change your mind, it is doubtful that you could back out now. Think of it this way: if you stay, nothing there is going to change, and the dysfunction you are experiencing now will still be there. The manager will still be what he is, and you will still be required to perform well without direction. Putting all your time into your side hustle could be just what you need. All that is yours - the good and the bad, so be happy and go for it!!

2. AnonymousNovember 29,2023 at 11:20PM UTC

   Of course you would like more time to go out on a win but if the role hasn't clicked for you by now, chances are it won't and you would continue not delivering up to your standards.

   No harm in not delivering on this job but congratulations on your success as a business owner.

3. AnonymousNovember 30,2023 at 12:04AM UTC

   Is your sadness driven by the concern that you’ve let your employer or colleagues down?

   If yes, give yourself a pat on the back for compassion, but don’t let it change your plans.

   Another possibility is that you’re feeling sad because you feel that you and your manager/s should have been able to salvage the situation. Your note indicates, however, that you and the employer were not a great fit for multiple reasons, despite the efforts of all parties. Incompatibilities are a part of life, and it’s reasonable to go in a new direction if better options exist.

   To me, your departure is a win-win. You get the chance to attend to your thriving business and your employer gets the chance to find a new hire who is a better fit.

   Congratulations on your new chapter!

4. AnonymousNovember 30,2023 at 1:29AM UTC

   You did the right thing. Work on your real business. The owner was being abusive.

5. AnonymousNovember 30,2023 at 1:22PM UTC

   The sadness could be coming from a bit of feeling like you failed. You didn’t. You’re choosing yourself. Celebrate that and kick your old boss to the curb! Throw a party!

6. BellaNovember 30,2023 at 6:08PM UTC

   Just a thought but could it be that your sadness is attributed to "what you wish that job could've been?" Change is scary. Holding onto the good memories of what we left behind is a normal response. Remember the big picture...job was an uphill struggle, boss makes you feel like you're not succeeding. Even the best coworkers are not worth that emotional abuse. It was never going to change. You made the right choice. Embrace it and thrive!

7. AnonymousNovember 30,2023 at 10:01PM UTC

   Look for Data Specialist positions with Federal Jobs. Many of the grants need someone that really understands informatics and can technically advise organizations with integration of data and reporting. Never stop looking and you could find a remote position. 55K is terribly undervalued.

8. GirlBossanova934974December 1,2023 at 1:16PM UTC

   In my view? It's a sad fact of life. You can't have it all. You cannot get to a fork in the road and choose both paths. Doesn't work that way. Because a lack of training, you were out of your element in the job you were in. At that point, you had a choice. Either get out or be prepared to get more training from another source if that source was available. You had a nice source of income which exceeded the money this employer was paying you. That's a darn good thing. Best thing to do is channel your energy into something you like, you do well at, and have already succeeded at.

9. AnonymousDecember 1,2023 at 1:35PM UTC

   Going though the same thing. Resigned from a position I love, it was rocky at first with no onboarding process and extremely difficult colleagues but I made the role work for me but it’s been 13 months now and I have had enough of the difficult colleagues, it shouldn’t be this hard. I feel scared and questioning my decision but I’m excited for the future too. Good luck, don’t look back :)

10. Cheryl WilburgDecember 1,2023 at 1:42PM UTC

    You made the right decision. It's a normal reaction. Be excited for your future, I am already excited for you

11. RoseannDecember 1,2023 at 1:54PM UTC

    You made the right decision. It can be scary to venture off on your own but you have what it takes to make it happen! You got this!

12. AnonymousDecember 1,2023 at 2:30PM UTC

    I've felt sad giving notice at my last job because although the position wasn't right for me and I was ready to move on it's my coworkers were lovely people. If you put in two full weeks it's a bit awkward with the flurry of goodbyes and people reaching out that can get overwhelming as well. I think once you actually leave the position and have a few days to unwind you'll realize you did the right thing. Your on a great new path working for yourself, you should be proud!

13. EMILY KIKUE FRANKDecember 1,2023 at 3:34PM UTC

    Every change involves a little bit of mourning. It's normal!

14. AnonymousDecember 1,2023 at 4:33PM UTC

    Sadly I went through a similar situation; loved my job and the population I served. The mgt environment was very toxic and I was extremely micromanaged by my 3rd boss who also found things to blame me for that were grossly inaccurate and inconsistent.

    I decided that the stress by mgt wasn’t worth my love for the job. It was very hard to quit and I did feel sad briefly. But it was the best decision I’ve made.

15. AnonymousDecember 1,2023 at 6:41PM UTC

    major changes like a job change always elicit that type of reaction if you have any soul. Keep in touch with your co-workers and don't lament what went wrong. Hopefully in your exit interview you give them real feedback on what could change to make things better for their next hire. If you do it with positivity and don't blame or point fingers you will impact change for others and rise above the fray. Good luck in your own business!

16. Meg ValentineDecember 1,2023 at 11:00PM UTC

    Unfortunately, if you are a bit of empath, all decisions like this are hard. And there are always good things and good people even in the harshest and most difficult roles and companies. Hang in there. If you needed this for your self-worth then you probably did exactly the right thing.

17. AnonymousDecember 2,2023 at 1:42PM UTC

    I want to address the personal finance aspect within your post. Do you have access to affordable health insurance? When you say the monthly income from your side hustle is more than your job did you calculate the total compensation from your W2 or are you basing it on just take home pay. Hopefully you included in insurance premiums, vacation, holidays, essentially all PTO, 401K matches and have factored in the taxes you will need to pay from your side hustle.

    I too have a side business and while at a glance it looks like I can quit my W2, but when I think about the total comp that my w2 provides I'm going to stick it out until I hit a specific net worth target as opposed to a monthly income replacement.

    I'm curious, how did you get a chance to focus on your full-time job while running a business? I'm not sure what type of business you run, but I do something that takes about 2 hours out of my week because it's passive and established. Do you work more than 20+ hours a week on your business? If so, how did you have time to settle into to a new full-time job while working a side business? I want to know if you really have the time to dedicate and focus on that new job because I know when I start a new job I tend to dedicate a lot more hours in the beginning while I'm onboarding, learning the company, culture, team dynamics, bosses habits and the role. Also, I wonder if the reason it doesn't feel right after you quit because the decision was more emotional and not practical.

18. Kimberly AnneDecember 2,2023 at 1:43PM UTC

    This is why the position was open. All these corporate jobs with better wages and benefits, esp large healthcare systems are very toxic. You go through so much only to be ill trained and abused them you have to leave to save yourself. I know-I been there. It’s heartbreaking.

19. AnonymousDecember 2,2023 at 1:49PM UTC

    Hi, I can relate to your feelings of sadness after the notice. I have also experienced (even in workplaces with very bad working conditions where I suffered a lot) ambivalent feelings after quitting.

    I felt sad because I connected well with my colleagues, clients or simply loved the tasks I was doing. So it's normal to feel sadness because there were alos some positive aspects. But don't forget, these were not enough there to keep you at this workplace.

20. Chelli MontgomeryDecember 2,2023 at 2:26PM UTC

    Congratulations on your side hustle success!

21. AnonymousDecember 2,2023 at 2:53PM UTC

    First, congrats on the side hustle success! Second, I can relate. I left a job earlier this year (for another job that didn't work out, now I'm working on my own VA business). I was very underutilized in the role and people were getting laid off. Every single day, I felt I was going to be next. It was really tough saying goodbye, as I truly enjoyed my colleagues, and I had two assistants who were amazing and I loved having them on my team and seeing them grow in their roles. I keep in touch with some of my former colleagues from that place - can you do the same?

22. Elizabeth WestDecember 2,2023 at 2:55PM UTC

    I think it's really healthy to miss the good parts if a past job or relationship. It does not invalidate to reasons you have for leaving. You're just going to miss the upsides of that past situation. One thought is perhaps you can try to continue or increase the friendships you've made or that you'd like to make from this job situation.

    Good luck as you transition !

23. Sangeetha ChitradurgaDecember 2,2023 at 5:13PM UTC

    I can totally relate to this! Feels so demotiviating and hinders your confidence. You made the right decision. It is better than been miserable everyday at work.

24. Rosa GoesDecember 2,2023 at 5:17PM UTC

    Goodbyes are hard, even with good reasons. Feeling sad is part of the process. Let it be. Keep in touch with your coworkers. Your side hustle success is an inspiration!

25. Janel Tiffany JonesDecember 4,2023 at 12:09AM UTC

    Congratulations on your side hustle success! I understand how you feel. Definitely keep in touch with your coworkers and focus on the new beginnings. Not everyone can say they are able to turn their side hustle into their primary income. Be proud of that and be excited for your elevation!

26. Bradford McCormickDecember 6,2023 at 8:43AM UTC

    Nobody can have everything and there may be things you legitimately will miss about the job but you sound at best ambivalent about it.

    There is the famous line from Julius Caesar: "Iacta est aiea" You crossed a line so you have to just get on with it.

    "Over the last two months it has really started taking off and is surpassing my monthly income." Sounds pretty good to me as an outsider. You don't have your past but It looks like you do have a future, doesn't it?

    It's none of my business (pun there), but I often think about Lot's wife in the Bible.

27. Bridget HarringtonDecember 6,2023 at 6:47PM UTC

    This is no different than leaving a relationship you had hoped would work out (and maybe it had some good points) but in your core know isn't good for you.

    You can feel sad about what was or what could have been...yet still know you have to go. My last job was HORRIFIC. We are talking a toxic, disrespectful manager, a company that was questionable in how it operated, bait and switch on my actual job responsibilities, etc. I was so grateful to find the job I now have. Yet on my last day, I hugged a few coworkers goodbye and got teary eyed. It was certain people I'd miss...not that job. If I want to see people again, I can...they are not tied to or exclusive to that work environment.

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