Negotiating one job offer while waiting for another…

Anonymous

July 25,2023 at 2:18AM UTC

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Negotiating one job offer while waiting for another…

Can I get some advice about handling job offers?

I received a job offer today (for which I'm grateful because I

left a great team but a toxic job in June 2022 to pivot my career and focus on my cancer treatment). I'm so happy to be healthy finally and have an offer, even knowing the path toward career growth at this organization needs to be clearer and the pay is less than comparable roles. The work is good, and the team is lovely, but I don't know if I see myself here long-term if I hope to grow. It also feels odd that they did not contact any of my references before making an offer for a role that requires a master's degree and 5-7 years of experience - is that normal?

However, the role that feels like the "best fit" is at another organization that is moving a bit slower (they're known for this) - my final interview isn't for another week (7/31). The preferred employer knows I'm interviewing elsewhere, but I only had a few days when all five interview panel members were available for my final interview. My friend and former colleague is not the hiring manager but is a senior leader who already submitted a formal, written recommendation on my behalf to HR and the hiring manager. He said the odds are in my favor that I'll get an offer here. But a feeling isn't the same as a contract, right? THIS role has a great team and obvious career growth opportunities, and the pay is $15K higher than the offer I received today. And the hiring manager and I hit it off well. All my internal and external cues lead me to believe I will get an offer once the final interview is complete, but this job search has left me cautious.

Here are my questions/struggles:

-How much time can I ask to consider the job offer I received

today? I asked for two days to consider the salary and benefits and plan to negotiate for a higher salary than they first offered - beyond that, what are my options for requesting more time to consider their offer? Is a week too

long? What do I say if they ask why I need more time?

-Is there any benefit to emailing the hiring manager for my

preferred role, before my final interview on 7/31, that I have an official offer from somewhere else? Or should I wait to share this with her when I meet with her during my interview next week?

I was at my last job for five years before resigning last

summer, so this negotiation process feels new and strange to me, like I've forgotten how I did it in past job searches. I am trying to do what is best professionally, personally, and financially, while also respecting each organization's hiring team. I'd like to frustrate as few people as possible.

Any advice will be so appreciated! Thanks to this community for your time and perspective.

And to everyone who has been/is riding the emotional

rollercoaster of the job search/soul search, I am with you in spirit, as are so many here. It's the wild west out there, and it feels too much some days, but this community has helped keep my spirits lifted and my outlook positive for more days than I can count—endless thanks and appreciation.

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Tami CannizzaroJuly 25,2023 at 3:20PM UTC
First, Congrats on the offer! Let that soak in - you got an offer and the balls in your court. Yet here's the deal when we have the power to choose: we sometimes have to take risk. What is your inner voice telling you? Try to put any fears from past experience out of your head, if you can. If you had no other offers, would you still be of the mindset, This is a good job but only short-term? And if so, is this really something you want to do? Can you be invested in this job day-in, day-out for as long as you are there? These are the questions we need to ask and feel good about. You talk about money; is that your motivator? For me, there's more to a job. I've taken jobs that pay much less and been extremely happy. I've taken jobs with titles that pay insane amounts and been miserable. All this to say, again, go with your gut. You probably know deep down what you want to do.
Elizabeth KalfasJuly 26,2023 at 10:44PM UTC
Thank you! And thank you for typing out all the questions in my head and heart. I resonate with everything you've shared here - it helps to see it in another person's words though. The money is not the motivator, believe it or not! But the role with more money happens to be where I see myself long-term, based on their team's longevity and commitment to work-life balance and professional development. The offer currently on the table has some great leadership, but there is high turnover in that department/team and that leaves me feeling nervous about why they haven't been able to retain people. Thank you so much for taking the time to be part of my thought process as I try to do right by me, and everyone else involved too!
Mary PoolJuly 30,2023 at 2:24PM UTC
Normally not being able to retain people is a red flag. However, today, employees are in flux. Their turnover could be due to personal issues. It is perfectly acceptable to ask why they have such a high turnover rate (asked respectfully, of course). My daughter took a position with a high turnover rate. It turns out the previous three people all left due to circumstances in their personal lives. She loves the job.
Tami CannizzaroJuly 31,2023 at 4:25PM UTC
You're welcome! Now that I read your new comments/response, I *think* you have your answer, although it may be difficult to listen to that inner voice/intuition. From experience, I learned the hard way to listen when my intuition/inner voice is trying to tell me something, even if I can't quite put my finger on it.
Cindy GloverJuly 25,2023 at 11:08PM UTC
This is wonderful news and I’m so happy for you!! I think all of us will agree that it’s nice to see someone who is enjoying what a career should be. I personally am a bit on the blunt side so my first instinct is to contact the 2nd company and lay it on the table. They knew after your interview whether or not they would give you the offer. I’m wondering if they are uncomfortable with a personal friend being there? Would you have any interaction or managerial association with her?
I would hate for you to be in your new position, a month or 2 go by and you’re wondering what could have been.
Im personally leaving the office in a storm so sorry for the short response
csnt wait for your reply ???
Elizabeth KalfasJuly 26,2023 at 10:39PM UTC
Thank you for this thoughtful reply! I sent the e-mail to lay it out for the second university - the one I feel most drawn to. In my first interview, they seemed thrilled I knew someone there and really seemed to respect my friend. But I see your point - and thankfully would not be working with him in any managerial way, so they wouldn't need to worry about my social connections interfering with work. My hope is to discuss this further on Monday during my post-interview lunch with the hiring manager. The irony here is that the roles are advising MBA students at universities and I feel like I'm living out my own career advising case study with this experience :)
I'll make sure to share an update once it all shakes out! Thank you again!!!
AnonymousJuly 30,2023 at 3:03PM UTC
So happy for you! You might want to mark your responses as anonymous. You never know who's reading these forums :).
Elizabeth KalfasJuly 26,2023 at 10:45PM UTC
Thank you!! I asked for a full 7 days from when they made the offer and will see what they say. I never even thought that they could retract the offer! Clearly, I've been out of the game for a while. I'm so grateful for your insight!
Mary PoolJuly 30,2023 at 2:17PM UTC
You can draw out the acceptance process by negotiating with them (as you plan on doing that anyway). Send your negotiating terms slowly. Perhaps an email that says I would like to discuss the salary, benefits (and whatever else you want to negotiate about) without the exact terms. They get back to you, and you get back to them (not necessarily that same day). Then after the 31st interview (which is only a few days away), tell the desired job you have another offer (it will make you look more attractive) and need to give the offering entity a firm answer by the end week. If they want you, they will act quickly. If they don’t act quickly, you have your answer.
AnonymousJuly 30,2023 at 3:07PM UTC
I would be careful in taking too long to consider that offer. You have a bird in the hand so to speak. I have accepted offers while still interviewing for the roles I really wanted. I would negotiate a later start date to give the other roles time to play out. I've had 2 things happen: 1. It was a good thing I accepted the offer from one place because the other one suddenly went into limbo aka a hiring freeze 2. I got the one I really wanted and thanked the other company for the offer but that I could no longer accept as I was moving in a different direction
AnonymousJuly 31,2023 at 5:55PM UTC
I would do the following: Let’s call the company that made you the offer #1 – thank them for the generosity of their offer in writing. Let them know that your decision is not one taken lightly and you only interviewed with a select few companies and you are in the final conversation with one other company where you have internal connections. Let them know the date plus one day of the next meeting. Tell them that you are making a decision about where to hang your hat for the next 5 plus years so you want to make the right choice. Ask them if you can let them know your decision by the end of that week. Do not ask for more money right now. Then go to the interview with #2 at the end of that interview send a thank you note to the hiring manager and inform them of the other offer. Let them know that you have to respond to #1 by the end of that week. Tell them you are disclosing this because you want to make the best decision for the long term but also do not want to lose offer #1 if they have no interest. Do not share details of the offer with #2 on what #1 gave you. Then if you get an offer from #2 and the compensation is greater (you seem to value that first) and the role and fit seem better then you can take that and graciously decline #1. You could send #1 a note and tell them how difficult the decision was but overall blame it on better fit (not better money) and wish them the best. If you tell them the other company offered you more money they might want to try to match the offer but clearly from your commentary you prefer #2 so why burn that bridge twice if you truly prefer #2. You may need #1 as an employer later on and they would forever remember you played they against another place for $$. Good luck, this is definitely a good problem to have and congratulations on kicking cancer's a$$
Cindy GloverAugust 18,2023 at 12:42AM UTC
Great advice!
AnonymousAugust 4,2023 at 8:40PM UTC
It is best to apply for one job at a time, too many at the same time will cause these issues. I apply for jobs that pay a salary that I need to live on, are located less than 10 miles from where I live, and perhaps other factors that are important to me at the time. If I find a job I think will work, I apply for it, see it through all the stages and if I am not offered the job, I move on to the next job. When I get an offer, I accept it, I don't look back and if any one else calls I don't pursue it.