Hello All,

10 Comments

1. AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 5:23PM UTC

   Start looking for a new job is of course the first piece of advice. I am going through something similar and I’ve taken on 2 part time jobs to save up in case I feel the need to quit before finding new employment. It’s terrible out here.

2. AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 5:47PM UTC

   Start looking to move on. I'm 50 and feel the same- and planning on moving on

3. AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 5:59PM UTC

   Have you sat your manager down and let them know what you need to feel supported? IF you have not this simple exercise might do it. If that doesn't work then the fit might not be right and you might have to change depts or look elsewhere. If this person hired you I often still think quarterly QBR's can really make a difference. Ask them also in the meeting what you can do to make them successful and to help the team hit their targets. Empathy for others even when you might think they don't give a fig can make changes happen with the right conversation.

4. Elizabyth HarringtonJanuary 29,2024 at 7:29PM UTC

   Plan a job change. Yes, this is totally easier said than done, so first do some self-care and don't let those voices in your head convince you that you are a failure in any way. Nobody has your back except you and my advice is not to waste your time trying to fit into a culture where you aren't valued. Life is too short. (this suggestion is coming from a fellow Gen Xer who was in your shoes not too long ago.)

5. AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 8:13PM UTC

   I would walk 2 paths simultaneously.

   I'd connect with my manager asking for feedback on how to be successful at your company. I'd have a few high-level thoughts and ideas and solicit them for theirs. I would remain as open as you can be and take in the feedback. It might also clarify whether this is a surmountable perception shift.

   I would also be actively looking for another job, I would go hard at it. If you can, approach it from an enlightened place. You've probably learned at your place or can uncover the things you've learned. Keep focused on what you're looking for with your new company, manager, team, or culture. Be idealistic and use it as a way to reset.

   The risk is that you may not like what you hear or it may put an even bigger target on you. But I would go in knowing a change is needed and one will probably result from this, whether at your current job or the next one.

6. AnonymousJanuary 29,2024 at 8:25PM UTC

   Is there anyway to change roles/department?

7. JJJanuary 29,2024 at 9:15PM UTC

   Is this a new manager? It could be the manager. And I have a question about your situation: do you think that being older has made you more assertive and that they are responding to that? I have noticed that when people think I am younger (yay me, baby face!) it’s all fun and games, but when I assert myself and actually make decisions, I get the cold shoulder.

8. AnonymousJanuary 31,2024 at 12:53AM UTC

   same here, but for me it is definitely toxic to stay

9. Colleen HansonFebruary 2,2024 at 2:37PM UTC

   I was in a similar experience about 7 years ago. I honestly felt like I could do no right in my position, even though I received numerous compliments on my work from outside of my department. I tried talking to my direct supervisor to no avail, I then talked to her supervisor; also to no avail. Eventually I went to HR to see if I could transfer to another department but they were no help. I dealt with this for over 2 years and my mental health really struggled and I ended up in therapy. I woke up one morning with such bad anxiety and started crying uncontrollably, and just decided to not go back there. If I had it all to do over again I would have left a lot sooner than I did. I would start looking for a new position if I were you. Best of luck!

10. Michelle GiurlaniFebruary 3,2024 at 12:17AM UTC

    Get ahead of the problem. It sounds like you've taken your first big step posting here so congrats! I think the first step is the hardest which is why in sales we recommend timeliness because it shows commitment and it's a way to keep your own self accountable not to mention the customer! My colleague just started a blog that is getting a lot of transaction on what his experience on looking for a new job as a person in their 5th decade and has /wants enough time for another career. Retirement agent is 78 UK and while COVID brought trends slightly down, I for 1. am not convinced that will fully recover until we get further w viruses. Much like Global Warming, sometimes the problem isn't always us but what the nations aross the globe or in CA's longitude for example will impact weather - like El Nino or the Atmospheric River starting in industrial super activity from industry. I will post his blog here if interested to learn his experiences.