Am I being quietly fired?

Am I being quietly fired? The reason I am asking is I am getting my old responsibilities that the receptionist did back. I was also told I would have to start covering the front desk at another location which almost an hour drive without traffic twice a week. What annoys me about this is this was announced during a group meeting, so I felt like I was put on the spot. I have been looking for another job and will be starting a certification program soon. The receptionist lives closer to the other office but she has been given more responsibilities while I am getting my old responsibilities back and not being assigned projects I was promised. I am starting to believe my manager wants me out but instead of telling me, I am being relegated to the shit work so I will quit. The receptionist is my manager’s favorite, which this company has the reputation for. In fact, I talked to a trusted colleague about the situation and she said it makes no sense, which it doesn’t and agrees the company has favoritism. A couple of her staff are planning to leave too. She is also interviewing for other jobs. I am leaving the area in November and I can’t up and quit right now due to financial reasons. I think I would be less bothered if my manager talked to me about this one on one instead of telling me during a group meeting. Just needed to vent.

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45 Comments

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  1. Anonymous

    Hi! So sorry you are going through this. Especially if you like the company, the work and your team. If you have been with this company for a long time, I would say it’s time to move on and find something better. And that pays more. Finish your certification, update your resume, start looking for a better job opportunity and don’t vent about this to your other co-workers. Change is always good. It’s a very crazy time in the workplace nowadays. You will do just fine :)

  2. Anonymous

    Questions, not comments. If you're leaving the area in November, why not apply at a Temp Agency for the time being? Is your current employer aware that you're planning to relocate? Could that have something to do with your situation?

  3. Anonymous

    So you've only got 2-3 months at this company no matter what? Do they know that already? Did they try to cut your pay?

    If they know you're only there a short time, it makes sense to not transition projects (that often go later than expected) just to have you start them and move them to someone else. It's not unusual in my field to have 90-days notice, and we would be working on documenting workflows and assigning short-term duties that would be easy to finish or someone else to pick up, which is what it sounds like you're describing. Regardless of whether they know or not, it's not a long period so as long as they aren't cutting your pay, I would just smile and do whatever they ask for your remaining time there.

  4. Anonymous

    This sucks but like you said you only have a few months left which makes it tolerable but still doesn't feel right.

    Hang in there.

  5. Anonymous

    Hang in there. I've been in your situation. You will persevere!!

  6. Kimberley Ferretti Hammett

    I don't think anyone can say for sure without knowing your boss but it certainly is a possibility that they are hoping you'll quit. It's also possible it's less conscious and malicious than you may feel it to be. Maybe this receptionist *is* the favorite and asked for some stretch projects so they are attempting to develop them and had to cover her work somehow so since you had the role previously thought of you and are simply ignorant to how that would be for you (also bad but more stupid and unprofessional than malicious). It's also possible they need to develop the receptionist toward a new position and your filling in is intended only to be a temporary gap-filler. They should communicate this to you better but also a less malicious possibility.

    Either way, it sounds like you already have one foot out the door anyway and the changing landscape and lack of communication is just a great way to say you're not going to miss out on much by leaving. Any of us would be questioning why, but a helpful perspective might be that on your path, it doesn't actually matter why they've made these changes. If you aren't planning to stay much longer anyway your energy will be better spent focusing on making it to November and finding your next step. Don't give them anything to fire you over and make your moves. If the workload is easier this way, though annoying, maybe it's a blessing to preserve your energy toward your move.

    I recently got out of a similar situation and found out from some of the others involved that my instincts actually were correct and the boss wanted me to leave because they believed I did something that I had not. It was frustrating but validating and I am also so glad that I left on my own terms and gave them nothing they can say against me. The boss spun their wheels and schemed and strategized and manipulated for months, technically got what they wanted but I did it myself and now they are in an awful situation where they can't fill the role with the right candidate and my new boss is supportive and intelligent and is helping me grow a lot! I hope you find a great new fit and can look back and laugh at the people who didn't know what a gem you are!

  7. Anonymous

    Yes, they’re trying to get rid of you with actions like this long drive to another location. They’re hoping it will be one so untenable that you’ll quit. I agree with others, power through for a few more months if you’re leaving in November.

  8. rgstaffing@bellsouth.net

    If the company knows that you are moving and leaving in November, they are already considering you on your way out and they are moving on. I don't know why you would give a notice in August unless you are contractually obligated. They will work around you which is what they are doing.

  9. Rachel Paluch

    They’re very obviously trying to make you quit so they won’t have to pay unemployment, to favor another employee or just because they’ve decided they don’t like you. The reason doesn’t really matter. I would document absolutely everything, bide your time and leave on your own terms.

  10. Anonymous

    Tell them you’re happy to work at that location but you’ll be unable to commute to the other one. Make them fire you.

  11. Rachel Paluch

    If she does that she leaves herself open to being fired for cause which would make her ineligible for unemployment benefits.

  12. Anonymous

    She was hired for one location, most likely. So I doubt very much that would hold water.

  13. Anonymous

    You were clearly blindsided and I suspect your thinking is correct, and perhaps the person who is the favorite had a private conversation about needing some time away. I would lay low do the minimum for the work until November unless you prefer they terminate you and address this thing head on. That will perhaps get you unemployment but it's not the best option. If you are spending extra gas money and they are not giving you mileage, ask for it.

  14. Anonymous

    Power through!! Did you tell anyone you were leaving or did you make that clear to your manager? I would never tell anyone I was leaving until I was in the clear to go. Either way, they know you're planning to depart so they're not going to invest in you. You can do this.

  15. Brie Roper

    Could you have a meeting with the head of HR? I know it can be scary to raise these concerns, but HR has legal obligations to support you and your leadership at times like this. If you feel like you trust your HR person, get an appointment with them and describe what has been happening. Regardless of how the situation turns out, a formal record of the issue should be made.

    I also just want to say I’m sorry this is happening to you and that you are feeling pushed out.

    Good luck!

  16. Fayola Horsford

    I'd be careful discussing future plans with any colleague, trusted or not. You'd be surprised to know the information was divulged so the company is simply protecting its own interest in your eventual planned departure from the area

  17. Anonymous

    So, so true. Telling your colleagues too much personal info can bite you badly, people will throw you under the bus to dave themselves quickly. I was let go from a job where they had to reduce workforce and at the meeting it was said that this is never easy to do, but they know I have a tremendous amount of management experience and will fair much better in the job market. How'd they know? I'd never discussed that experience nor put it on the resume. They said the feedback they received from peers where I'd discussed processes in previous roles, someone literally said she's got mgnt experience she'll bounce back I'll be looking for months, etc etc it was hurtful

  18. Anonymous

    I agree with Fayola! If you need to speak with someone about your work situation, share with a trusted friend or family member rather than a coworker. I trusted a coworker with my personal plan a few years ago, and soon everyone at work knew about it.

  19. Amy Carissa Oliver

    i agree with you. When I read OP is leaving the area in a few months I immediately thought that the employer is giving more responsibilities to the receptionist to prepare for OP’s departure. I don’t think this is favoritism or punishing OP. I think the manager found out and is making necessary preparations. They still should have talked to OP first rather than announcing it in a team meeting but if they found out about the departure through the grapevine they may have felt they aren’t obligated to do so.

  20. Anonymous

    Definitely not telling her about my move.

  21. Lesheka

    I'm sorry that this is happening to you...your manager was highly unprofessional in their approach. I don't know you, but you deserve better than this. Your work environment sounds toxic. Don't tell anyone about your plans: relocation, finding another job, etc. Move silently. I would document everything and push through this...remember that these people are not your friends, collect your paycheck at the end of the week and keep it moving. You'll overcome this.

  22. Anonymous

    This!!

  23. Anonymous

    That’s very true. I will not be telling anyone about my moving plans. It’s none of their business and I don’t want any negative energy. I am just going to push through, act like business as usual. I am not telling my colleague about my relocation either.

  24. Anonymous

    Whatever the case may be if you're not happy is time to move on you deserve to be happy rather than constantly wondering why you're being excluded ..

  25. Aaron Alexander

    None of my business but when I see someone giving advice like this , anonymously, it makes me wonder if the person giving this advice even has a job . The world doesn’t owe anyone anything! It really doesn’t matter how you “feel” or what you think you “deserve” ! That kind of mind set will get you nowhere in the real world

  26. Rebecca Van Hout

    Since it's just a few months until you move and you're looking for another job I'd recommend just doing what you have to do to get through it and not burn any bridges. Hopefully you'll find another job you love

  27. Barbara White

    I agree--given it's just a few months, just tough it out and prepare for the next job! It's not easy. Best of luck!

  28. Anonymous

    It's pretty obvious what's going on, whether you mentioned to anyone that you're moving or not. It's your call what to do, but the job market is horrible right now & unless you can immediately find yourself a temp job for 3 months, you're better off sticking it out where you are until you move. Even if they do fire you & you get unemployment, it'll only be half or less what you're making now. Since it's such a short amount of time, were I in your shoes, I would say nothing at all to anyone about anything going in my personal life, do whatever they give me, knowing that there is an end quickly in sight, & get out clean. BTW, now would be an excellent time to start looking for a job in the place you are moving. Getting hired always takes 3x longer than we think it will, & unless you're in retail, businesses pretty much stop hiring in November & December, so hang tough for now, collect your paychecks & get planning for the future. Good luck to you!

  29. Rosa Goes

    Sorry to hear your going through this. You are doing the right thing by looking for another job. Hang in there while you do. It's best to leave when there's favoritism because it's out of your control. Good luck to you!

  30. Bradford McCormick

    You use the word for excrement to describe certan tasks you are being assigned. You are being treatedlike that. Are you being quietly fired? Do they have reason to terminate your employment "with cause" (non-performance, malfeasance, etc.)? If not, don't help them to hurt you.. You say you need to stay there until November. So just do everything right, be scrupulously polite and show they sincere appreciation until you can walk up and out the door. Do not give them any excuse to say i was your fault. (Might you need unemployment comp, are any termination benefits at stake, etc.?)

  31. Anonymous

    Definitely my plan. Thank you!!

  32. Marian Davidson

    This is a very common tactic, and perfectly legal. If they are cautious about firing you, because they really have no cause, they can make the job miserable so that they force you to quit on your own. That does not mean that if you stay, they will find some excuse to let you go. In fact, having to commute to another location, set you up for failure. For example, you may be tardy to your next location. . I was actually trained on this tactic during a management training program. I would recommend that you polish that résumé and take some thing, anything, to get out. You know it’s always easier to get a job while you have one make no mistake, they’re going to find a way to get rid of you one way or the other.

  33. Marian Davidson

    If it makes you feel any better, this tactic is only used with employees that are performing well enough that they can’t be removed by any other means. The work is satisfactory, they are protected under law from discrimination, etc..

  34. Anonymous

    I've seen the same tactic used for employees that basically "sucked" too much in comparison to everyone else and they didn't have just cause to fire yet. Cutting hours when that is applicable is also a tactic

  35. Anonymous

    Right, they have nothing on me because I do my work and do it right. It’s mostly politics. Unfortunately there is an in group and out group, which stems from leadership.

  36. Focused340934

    This is such excellent insight! Thank you!

  37. Focused340934

    If they somehow know you're leaving, they may just be preparing for it, but this sounds like you have a boss that either doesn't want to deal, or doesn't want confrontation. The advice already given is top notch. Be perfect, better than perfect...especially since you know you're leaving. And really, really enjoy it when you give your notice ;)

  38. Anonymous

    No mention of leaving to any coworkers. Oh I can’t wait until I give my notice.

  39. Anonymous

    I am definitely keeping my mouth shut!

  40. Anonymous

    You might be getting quietly demoted while they try to shoe-horn the favored woman to a similar position to yours instead, if not trying to get you to quit. As much as it probably sucks, the best course of action seems to stick it out since you leave the area soon; if they fire you, you might get severence, but not if you quit of course. If you know others are quitting soon, you may become a hot commodity suddenly.

  41. Wiremu Ruka

    did you sign a nw contract when you got a new position

  42. Anonymous

    That is so disrespectful to announce in group setting since you’re being told then too! So sorry that happened to you. The good news is that you will be leaving in a few months. A one on one meeting with you should have occurred. Would if you had obligations after work that would interfere?

  43. Anonymous

    This sounds bad. Can you just up front ask them to terminate you with severance? I did that once and it worked.

  44. Anonymous
  45. Anonymous

    My attorney called it "structured termination", but however you phrase it, it's enough to turn HR's blood cold & will slide you into an unemployment claim without a blink. I suspect it would also work well were you motivated enough to sue your company, but for a clerical position, I'd just take the unemployment & run.

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